The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
08/22/13
Spot on topic, and good story in the process. I enjoyed it. Thank you.

God bless~
08/23/13
That would certainly be a horrible feeling, to lose a valuable computer.

I did feel that your main characters' reactions were a bit over the top and unrealistic. Perhaps a bit less stuttering and loss of breath, and his wife need not scream.

Your story had good pacing and the best possible ending.
08/23/13
So happy for the ending. I hate losing things, but a company computer would be a big deal.

I like your story and you did a good job with the topic.

Thanks.
08/23/13
Great story, thank you for sharing.

I do agree with Jan about the realism of some of the incidents in the story (police responding so promptly to a computer theft and the reactions of the characters).

Well done.
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