The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/18/06
Great story. I almost didn't finish it (thinking it was just another "guy-on-the-beach" thing,) but as I read on I got caught up in the drama of shipboard setting. I especially love this line: "There is a whole lot more to guarding a life than merely keeping a body afloat" - lots of food for thought there.
11/18/06
Really enjoyed, and was caught up in, the drama of this. I kept thinking "Titanic" - don't know if it was just me. Great detail and wonderful voice.
11/18/06
You followed the structure of the storyline well. To succeed in Masters, it would help you a lot to avoid standard descriptions, such as: bone-chillling, silky voice, ocean grave etc. The Thesaurus is an excellent tool for changing these words to other synonyms.
11/19/06
I also kept thinking of the Titanic! I am glad that your character was able to give comfort in such difficult conditions.
11/23/06
So touching and a powerful message. Thanks for sharing this story with us. It was moving.