The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/18/06
You captured some beautiful moments that I could easily picture. I think that if you had introduced us to Mad Melvin at the beginning the story would have flowed even better - there was a lot that you explained, and a lot of the info. could have been left out in order to make Melvin and his rescue of the boy much more solid. With 750 words it helps a lot to restrict the story to one incident without too much info. on anyone but the MCs.
Titan's Point sounds like the perfect place for me to live. I liked your characters, and the way Mel has gone fishing in his mind. Is this a true story? Sounds real.

Blessings as you write to glorify HIM!
11/19/06
A rich, visual description with very believable characters.
11/22/06
I liked this story very much, and I was definitely captured by the story. Excellent work; thanks for sharing this
11/22/06
Great job. It was very believable, especially the part about the one someone would "least expect" being the one who saves him. Great job.
11/22/06
Well done, visual, like the opening of a longer work. Thanks for sharing.
11/22/06
You did a wonderful job of setting this story, and giving us all the little details necessary to make it very real. Wonderful!
11/22/06
great descriptions. Really started with a bang and kept on from there. Good read! :-)
11/23/06
Great piece, well deserved win. COngratulations
Congrats! Awesome job!
Congratulations! Nice job.
Congratulations, James! This was very entertaining. I love your unique characters and the twist with Mad Melvin saving your main character.
11/27/06
I particularly liked the first section because it appealed to more than the sense of sight. Also the way the story had a future i.e. Tommies reappraisal of Mad Melvin and the changing feelings of an adolescent boy towards girls. yeggy