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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Oops (01/14/10)

TITLE: the fireplace vase
By Jim McWhinnie
01/18/10


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the fireplace vase

a little boy reaches,
reaches higher and higher,
to the shelf above the fireplace fire,
fingertips barely touching
the pretty, pretty vase,
painted with the pretty lady's face.

"Almost got it! Almost do!"
"Oh no, oh no!"
then in a teetering, tottering moment
it slips away from his wanting touch,
to begin its slow and fatal last descent,
to a broken end that was not meant.

a little boy filled with oops and fears,
midst the crashing, smashing, shards of tears,
"What has he done?"
"What will she say?"
surely she is on his way.
the wait, the wait, it seems so long,
when standing, waiting in the wrong.

hurried footsteps come his way,
upon the wooden, farmhouse floor,
then a soul rushes through the door,
a worried, anxious, aging face,
laced with gentle, patient, healing grace,
to sweep away the tears and fears,
and all the pieces on the ground,
to learn the joy of being found.



And this is so vividly true for I am that little boy.


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This article has been read 398 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Joanne Sher 01/23/10
You did a wonderful job of capturing the4 emotions - both the fear and the gratitude and grace. Lovely.
Janice Fitzpatrick01/23/10
Oh wow, this is amazingly beautiful and so relateable for each of us have been that little boy. Thank God that He is loving and forgiving. Thank you for writing this. I really needed to read this today. God bless you.:0)
Allen Stark01/24/10
This kind of reminds me of how our loving heavenly Father deals with the remaking of broken vessels. Beautiful writing.
Chely Roach01/25/10
Just gorgeous. I loved the phrase shards of tears...perfect. Your poetry always feels calm, soothing, comfortable. Lovely.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 01/25/10
Very nice. I could feel the fear and remorse in the little boy. Thank you for sharing.
Barbara Lynn Culler01/26/10
I love the grace shown to the little boy! Good story.
Patricia Herchenroether01/26/10
I think this poem would be absolutely perfect if you kept to a distinctive pattern. At times it seemed like free verse but other stanzas rhymed. For instance, the first stanza, a,b,b,c,d,d had its own rhythm and flow and I expected to see the same pattern. The story content is lovely and Mom's gracious response brought happy tears to my eyes. May I print this out? (I love poetry) Patty
Carol Slider 01/26/10
What a lovely and tender poem! My son has made it to the age of seven without breaking anything of monetary or sentimental value... but I think I'll print this out to remind myself, just in case... :) Beautiful job on this.
Jan Ackerson 01/27/10
Absolutely beautiful.
Verna Cole Mitchell 01/27/10
beautifully touching
Eileen Knowles01/27/10
Beautiful poem! I felt for the little boy waiting to be found out. Glad the mom was gentle and loving :)
Julie Seeto01/28/10
Loved this entry, especially the lines:
"the wait, the wait, it seems so long,
when standing, waiting in the wrong."

So true!