The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/04/12
Sounds like a wonderful family and loved the tradition of apple butter! I was drooling for some...but especially the cookies. I bet all of your friends wanted to come over and neighbors could smell that incredible aroma for miles and miles.

Thank you. Nicely done.

God Bless~
This is a sweet trek down memory lane. I think when times were simpler people appreciated the little things so much more.

Try working on doing more showing instead of telling. For example this sentence My mom labored in the kitchens from morning until night, her hands hurried from the task of washing dishes to cooking dinner. This isn't a great example But I hope it helps some. Try to close your eyes and picture what you are saying, then include little details to paint a picture for the reader like "Sweat dripped down her face as she kneaded the bread."

You did a nice job of writing on topic and you took your reader back to a simpler time in life.
I loved your story. Apple Butter on fresh baked bread still warm from the oven is fabulous. I loved those simpler times. Thank you for sharing and God bless.
05/10/12
Congratulations and God Bless~