The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
This story grabbed me at the very beginning and held me to the end. I loved your modern "Abraham." You presented the wife's frustration vividly.
08/28/08
Well-done with the portrayal of the strained relationship between David and Sarah.

It feels just a tad predictable, but I'm not sure how you could have got around that.

Good job with dialogue, and with the Scriptural tie-ins. Nice story!

08/29/08
The fertility treatment and relationship tensions sound very true to life. It is difficult to make the ending surprising. Could the hero could have been a bit more active- sought out his beloved with out expectation?