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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: FRESH START (01/05/17)
The plane landed on the tarmac, rubber meeting earth. My hopes descended from heaven to earth along with it.
A silent prayer rose from my lips. “God, could this be a fresh start for us? A new beginning? Please, Lord. Help us make the most of this!”
They looked like toy soldiers, there in the distance. As they marched in formation towards us, excitement mounted in the crowd of longing ones. Our soldiers were on the same continent again, the same piece of earth. They were home.
The swelling crowd walked into the hanger, waiting. Minutes later, we heard the rhythm of pounding boots reverberate against the pavement. My heart beat in tune, as I stood trembling.
Outlined in the fading light, I saw his face. The same eyes, the same mouth, the same firm jaw. But had anything else changed? Could we meet together in this place and become one again?
Several high ranking officers gave short speeches, as the uniformed men stood at attention. Their words were muffled by the blood rushing in my ears. Hope and fear battled in my chest.
I remembered the fights, the words like knives. Why do two people so desperately in love deliberately wound each other? How can those hurts be healed from halfway across the world? I still felt the pain in my chest, the searing burn of rejection.
We spoke frequently over the past eight months. Words flying over the sea, like the ocean between our hearts. Could this place be a bridge? The ancient Israelites named dirt and stone by their spiritual significance. Like Bethel, the House of God, where Jacob wrestled with God and won His blessing. I longed to name this place. Longed to grasp hold of God and never let go.
Suddenly, the speakers rang with the pronouncement, piercing my thoughts. “You are dismissed!” Confusion and joy rang to the rafters as people swarmed the soldiers, seeking the one they loved. Husbands and wives embraced. Tiny babies held for the first time. Fathers and mothers wept on their sons' broad shoulders.
Finally, the crowd broke between us. Our eyes met, and in that moment, I knew. My heels struck the pavement as I ran to him, and he caught me in his arms.
Kissing me, he held my face in his rough hands.
“Can we start over, baby? Let go of the past and begin again?” my soldier pleaded.
I wrapped my hands around his and nodded yes, unable to speak. Caught in his arms once more, I felt the Lord’s presence, His blessing. Indeed, this was our Bethel. The House of God.
(This is a fictional story.)
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This article has been read 406 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Trudy Newell
01/13/17
Wow - you had my attention the whole way. Good job. Great word pictures.
C D Swanson 
01/14/17
Beautifully written with a powerful message!
Great job
God Bless~
Lisa Enqvist 
01/14/17
I love the thought you shared about naming "dirt and stone" by their spiritual significance. We need to put up some reminder for ourselves of each new start God has given us.
Joy Bach 
01/15/17
I agree with the comments. Just one critique. It makes for easier reading when you leave some white space between paragraphs. Keep up the good work.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
01/17/17
You did a nice job of pulling me in and letting me feel the MC's emotions. I think this is a fresh take on the topic and an enjoyable read.
Larry Whittington
01/19/17
Well written. Written thoughts bring emotions to the surface.This could be a real life scene.

Nice work.
Trudy Newell
01/21/17
Congratulations! Katrina - good job.
Bonnie Bowden 
01/22/17
Congratulations, Katrina, in your top three placing in the Beginners.

I liked your descriptive writing. The raw emotions of your MC seemed to bubble to the surface.

My main suggestion is to double space between paragraphs to create some white space.