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I remember the first time I fell in love.
He was the victorious white knight who came to rescue me.
All the universe revolved around him, the sun rose and fell at his word.
So beautiful was the light he gave, the stars bowed their heads in envy.
He was so far above all others that they knelt down at his name.
I could not believe how lucky I was, that he had chosen me to love.
He was a prince; any maiden would have gladly fallen at his feet.
Yet somehow, I caught his eye although I was not his equal.
The price he paid for me would have made you think I was a queen.
The gift he gave me was more precious than diamonds and sapphires.
I could not wait to spend time with my beloved.
Excuses were made to stay; yet I knew I should leave.
Eagerly I waited for his return, longing to see him again.
His voice or even a glimpse of his face would thrill me.
I searched for him; afraid of missing even a minute with him.
Hours were spent just thinking of ways to please him.
His pleasures came before my needs.
I did not have to ask what he liked; I knew.
I went out of the way to bless him with it.
Even if all we did was sit and hold each other,
It was precious valued time I would not relinquish.
We did not have to use words to speak.
Each other’s thoughts and sentences,
We could finish as easily as our own.
Our hearts were one, our souls were one.
Without the other one, we were incomplete.
He filled the empty hole in my heart.
Surely, we were designed to be together.
Since the beginning of time,
How did we ever live apart from each other?
When I could not spend a day, an hour, with him I felt cheated.
Sweeter than honey to me, were the words he spoke.
Every one of them I clung to; and placed deep inside my heart
For I valued them more that the finest gold or silver.
I treasured every love letter he wrote, and read them repeatedly.
To hear him say, “I love you,” meant more than life itself.
I knew beyond any doubt that we would be together for all eternity.
Nothing was capable of keeping us apart; this was true love.
They would write sonnets about this love. It would never fade.
Forever I would be by his side, walking in his footsteps.
His wings of love covering my head, His glory covering me.
Then one day I realized that I was spending less and less time with him.
It had happened so slowly that I had not been aware of it.
His wonderful love taken for granted, began to fade away.
Foolishly, I let myself believe that my worth came from me
And the world enticed me with her momentary pleasures.
My eyes no longer searched for him, or sought his face.
When he came near my heart no longer jumped for joy.
His letters were a chore to read and I often forgot.
I was too busy to sit and just be still with him.
He would speak, but I did not hear his wisdom.
Pleasing him instead of me, was far from my mind.
We would schedule time to be together, to share our hearts.
I would say, “Do I have to go?” and look for excuses not to meet.
My heart turned to another, and I went in search of other pleasures
Breaking my vow of love and tearing my true love’s heart to pieces.
His love was so great that he let me walk away,
He would not hold me against my will.
From his eyes flowed tears enough to fill the oceans
As he mourned our lost of fellowship.
With his arms open wide he cried, “I forgive you.”
“I love you, I am willing to lay down my life for you.”
“Come back” written in red, he penned across my soul.
In time, I realized just what I had given up,
That what I had run after, would never satisfy me.
As I lay in utter despair, grieving over my choices.
Award now that I had traded heaven with him for the emptiness of Hell.
My true love came once more in search of me.
Putting his arms around me He said, “Come home. I still love you.”
Not believing my ears, I asked,
“You would take me back again knowing all that I have done?”
My sins would fill the deepest valley until it became a mountain.
You deserve so much more than I can ever give to you or be.
Christ answered, “Yes, nothing can ever stop me from loving you.”
“My nature is that of love.
I can do no less for it is who I am.
It is unconditional not depending on who you are,
Or what you think you have done to earn it.
Even your sins cannot stop me from loving you.”
“Although they are as scarlet as my blood
I will wash you whiter than new fallen snow.
Forgiving you and cleaning each spot.
Come here, my Bride; put on my robe and crown.
I have made a mansion for you.
Come and reign with me.”
Kathy Barnes
Copyright 09-05-08
I said I love You with all my heart but do I?
You said if I love You; then I would obey Your will,
I will follow Your commands; I will show Your love.
When I stand back and look from afar, what do I see?
Is it love or only me; playing at a game?
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