Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: CROWD (07/06/17)
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TITLE: The Watching Crowd | Previous Challenge Entry
By Melanie Kerr
07/11/17 -
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he parades his piety
he stands proudly centre stage
under a spotlight
the audience wildly applaud but
God’s not looking
before the watching crowd
he draws the wallet from his pocket
to a trumpet fanfare
with a flourish he extracts a coin or two
left hand and right hand collude but
God’s not looking
before the watching crowd
a few paces shy of the synagogue door
he sinks to his knee to pray
tallit tossed over his shoulder
a fountain of words spill from his lips but
God’s not looking
before the watching crowd
he solemnly lifts an ash smeared face
shampoo and soap spurned
he clothes himself in his best sackcloth
and adds suffering to his posture but
God’s not looking
this man has traded
the closet for the market place
the unseen for the obvious
the temporary for the eternal
the heart of God for the eyes of man
God’s not looking
and the man
and the crowd
and the world they inhabit are
never transformed
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Having said that, I LOVED The Watching Crowd. It certainly reflects today's times. Well done!
With just a few well-chosen words, you painted a vivid picture.
Very well done.
My only critique would be this story centers as much on the individual as it does on the crowd - but it is an amazing story and I especially savored the ending
Blessings
Blessings~