The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/25/19
Thanks for this positive, heartfelt devotional.
This is a powerful testimony. I'm not usually a fan of using the first-person-plural voice because it can isolate some readers. For example, I'm not a morning person, but you did cover that one area in your opening line, so that helps. I think it's a personal preference but I think it might have had more of an impact if you used I/me instead of we/us. I think that makes me feel more connected to the MC, but I also know others who prefer the other way. Having been sick, 80% bedbound, and struggling to leave the house for even fun things made me relate to much of what you were saying. There are many people who feel like a burden (including me), and you do a great job in witnessing to people like me as well as cancer patients and others who suffer. I'm not sure I'd have guessed the topic if I hadn't known it, but your message is strong. I think following the Holy Spirit while writing is more important than nailing the topic. You have a really powerful message. I can feel your passion, and I'm sure that your words will touch people in ways we might never expect. In the end, that's what matters most. Good job.
I have not had to deal with constant illness, but I do know depression! Thank God he is there for us when no one else is. I had a hard time trying to see where the topic of feet fit it, other than your title of walking.
I love your ending...see a rainbow through the shower of tears. We all have experienced a loss of some sort or a huge disappointment, but when we seek God in our suffering He meets us in wonderful ways. It may take longer than we like but he sends the rainbow if we keep our eyes looking for it. Thank you for encouraging words.
01/31/19
I can "see" the invisible feet of those who walk these health journeys. Your entry goes from every day existence then through the trials of putting one foot in front another to persevere, and carry on with a new normal. Nice job!