The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 241 times
Member Comments
Beautifully written piece highlighting the search for something more, the search for peace, for Truth.
I really enjoyed this well-told story and particularly it's ending of hope. You seem to have researched the subject matter well so it has a ring of truth,though I assume it is fiction. Well written!
Nicely done...
Great job with the character and story development. I certainly didn't like the mc at the beginning but you made me feel sorry for him and had me rooting for him by the end.
This is s powerful story. You give great insight. There are many who can't fathom a life like that. My only complaint is the ending is a bit cliche. While I believe in angels, sometimes they can be overdone. In my mind, it might have been more powerful for him to look to see who said the words, but the only person nearby was a little girl who looked to be 4 or 5. The reader wouldn't see that coming like they might see mysterious strange or dream scenario. If I were editing, I might go a step farther and encourage you to make the toddler the daughter of the supplier; but those are just the ramblings of a crazy person. You did great. Congratulations on ranking 17 overall. Happy Dance!