The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/08/14
Your story was a profound commentary and powerfully executed. The imagery popped throughout your entry, and the internal dialogue of the MC was uncomfortable, because it reeked of "reality" which is so sad, I wonder how many of the "homeless" think thoughts such as your MC. I will remember your entry each time I see such an individual.

Brilliant, jarring, sobering, and well done!

God bless~
11/08/14
Just a note: When saying, "the dialogue was uncomfortable" I meant it in a complimentary fashion. It was so authentic it just jarred the soul.

Well done!

God bless~
Oh my word, what a powerful and sad piece! Great take on the topic.
11/09/14
Your contemporary fiction is a true to life reflection on far too many homeless peoples struggles to survive.

You've taken the reader right into the miserable situation, warts and all, or maybe nose mucous and all, and you've done it brilliantly.

Great writing. Hope to see it rate well.
11/09/14
Graphic description that is so accurate, recalling years of working among the living dead who only had street smarts to rely on. But they all had a story. This one is well told.
11/10/14
Very descriptive and on topic!
Your details paint such a sad portrait--right on topic.
Wow what a powerful piece. I love your viivd descriptions, but I'm a sucker for snot stories. Seriously though, you did an amazing job of bringing it to life. At first, I was going to comment that the voice seemed to bounce back and forth. Sometimes it felt like her thoughts, others that she was talking to someone specific, but I wasn't sure who. However, the more I think about it, the more I like it. It creates an almost frenzied tempo and the wanderings seem a perfect fit for the character. It may not be considered the form to use, but I think it gave this amazing piece a more authentic feel.Congratulations on ranking 7th in level 3! Happy Dance!