VBS Woes | Previous Challenge Entry

how it works

TITLE: VBS Woes | Previous Challenge Entry
By Sarah Fehr
06/11/17
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“Honey, just relax,” my husband pleaded as I sat in the middle of the floor with my head in my hands. All around me, mounds of papers and workbooks towered like a model of the Rockies.

My lips formed a cynical smile. “Babe, right now I either need to either 1) laugh heinously or 2) sob my guts out. But relaxing is NOT an option!”

“Ok, look, what can I do to help you?” my husband nervously asked. His eyes were darting again, a sure sign of anxiety. The deer caught in the headlights, so to speak.

I sighed and put my head back into my hands. “I don’t even know where to begin! I can’t tell you how to help me because I can’t even think through what needs doing!” I listlessly picked up a stack of workbooks and shoved them at my husband. “I guess you can start punching out the figures the kids will be gluing into their books.” My husband accepted the stack with both hands, as if holding on for dear life.

“But, wait!” I interjected as he began to peruse the books. “Make sure you keep all the classes separated. And for each class you need to sort them into days of the week. And we decided to use some out of the Kindergarten book in preschool, so we need twice as many. And don’t tear the punch-outs, because the kid that gets the torn one will complain that his Daniel has no head, or whatever the case may be.” (Why do kids get so worked up about little things like a missing head? Use your imagination here! Kids spend too much time glued to video games.)

Oh, it had seemed like such a FUN thing to do way back in the dreary days of winter. I had volunteered to chair the VBS committee out of desperation for something to keep me from sinking into the doldrums. Now I decided I’d rather be feeling a little blue than feeling extremely crazy.

My husband broke into my bleak thoughts. “Ok, Honey, aren’t you on a committee with a few others? Don’t try to take the whole load yourself!”

I sighed and stared into space. “You’re right, but I figured it would be easier to have all the materials in one place rather than parceling them out and who knows what would happen to them.” Spaghetti sauce stains? Green crayon? Gasp – a trip down the toilet? I put my hands to my throat in consternation.

“You know Hon, you’re going to have to give up some control here. I know you want everything to be perfect, but you have to put some trust in the other committee members. You are taking on way too much!”

I closed my eyes for a moment. “Okay, okay,” I muttered in a defeated tone. “Maybe each of us could take one part to work on. But we definitely need to bring everything back together by the end of the week so that we can smooth out any problems!”

My husband smiled knowingly. “I can see that fist loosening the least little bit,” he teased.

I got to my feet and slipped my cell phone out of my jeans pocket. After sending a text to the committee members, I fell onto the couch and put my head back. It was time for my favorite relaxation technique: the ABC’s. James Herriot’s All Things Bright and Beautiful, lilac bubble bath, and rich creamy chocolate. I rifled through my chocolate stash. Ah! Lindt balls! (Not to be confused with lint balls.)

I hastily twisted my hair into a clip and turned on the steamy water, pouring in generous amounts of bubble bath. “Heavenly,” I thought to myself, breathing deeply.

After assuring myself that the chocolate and the book were within reach, I shed my clothes and slipped under the bubbles. My muscles immediately began to relax. I popped in a chocolate ball for more pure joy.

My eyes fluttered as I drifted off to sleep, and I awoke to the annoying chime of my cell phone. “Hello,” I rasped. “Oh hi! What, your toddler ripped out every single page of the workbooks? Your 5-year-old used them as toilet paper? Your dog ate all the craft sticks? The church burned down?” I giggled lightly. “Oh, don’t worry about it, everything will be fine. We’ll get it all figured out. Don’t get so stressed! Relax, it will all be okay.”

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