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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Oops (01/14/10)
Little Angel’s tunic didn’t fit right. For some reason, it was always too long, despite being hemmed up frequently. It bothered everyone else that his tunic was too long, but Little Angel was not at all concerned. He was a very happy Little Angel. Of course, all the angels in heaven were good natured, it’s just that some had very serious jobs and didn’t have time to play, and there was a lot going on in heaven.

From very high up, all the angels could lie on their tummies and look down on the earth and watch whenever they had a chance. Little Angel could tell that something very exciting was going on because more angels than usual were watching the small, blue planet. It had been raining on the earth for days and days. Never before had it rained so much. Some of the angels were confused and asked each other why it would rain for so long, but no one had an answer.

Little Angel was as confused by the rain as everyone else. There was so much of it! He looked up at the big throne to see if the Lord was confused too, but He didn’t seem to be. All of a sudden a great commotion made Little Angel look around just in time to see some of the big angels running off to the Colors and Sparkle place. Little Angel loved that place, though he had been forbidden to go there after he was caught splashing fish with silly colors. Still, there was something going on and he just had to find out what it was.

He jumped up, grabbed his tunic, and ran after the big angels. He slipped into a corner behind a big pot of color and looked down. He couldn’t believe his eyes. The big angels were lowering a giant crystal arch into the sky above the earth. It was shinny and clear and beautiful.

“Wow!” said Little Angel, as he came out of his hiding spot. “What is that?”

“It’s new!” said a big angel nearby. “Once the rain stops, the Lord has promised to never make it rain so much again. This arch will be a promise to the people every time they see it.”

“Oh,” said Little Angel. He squinted at the gleaming arch. “It’s so shinny and clear. It’s kind of hard to see.”

“It’s not done yet,” said the big angel. “We’re just about to pour color into it.”

Little Angel loved watching the coloring. “What color is it going to be?” he asked excitedly.

“Gold,” said the big angel. “Don’t you think that will be pretty?”

Little Angel nodded. “It’s going to be beautiful!”

“OK,” called out the big angel. “Bring over the color pot. Let’s get this done.”

A huge crane lowered down to pick up a big color pot, but Little Angel couldn’t see very well because so many other angels had come to watch as well. He looked around and saw an empty shelf he could sit on with a great view. He climbed up on a stack of boxes and crawled up on the shelf and swung his legs over the side. Some worker angels attached the top of the pot to the crane and motioned to the crane operator to lift it up.

Little Angel was so excited. He loved cranes. When the pot began to rise up off the floor, he couldn’t help himself. He jumped up to his feet, but he got caught in his tunic and fell forward. “Whoa!” he shouted as he tried to grab something to hold on to. Unfortunately, he grabbed a pot of red color. The red pot fell over, then the orange pot fell, then the yellow pot fell, then the green pot fell, and then the blue pot fell.

Well, everyone in heaven watched in horror as all the colors poured into the great crystal arch. They looked at the colorful arch, they looked at each other, and then they looked at Little Angel. He was covered in colors from his little wings down to the long hem of his tunic. He looked up scared and worried. And then he heard, “Little Angel, come here!” It was the Lord.

Slowly, Little Angel went to stand before the big throne. He held his hands behind his back and looked up to see the Lord smiling at him. “I like it,” He said.
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This article has been read 928 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Mildred Sheldon
01/21/10
This was so cute. It could be a childs story. Thank you for sharing such a touching story. Keep writing and God bless.
Joan Campbell
01/21/10
A creative and fun story.
harvestgal Ndaguba
01/22/10
I totally loved this story.
c clemons
01/23/10
You have a talent for writing, good writing.
Karen Pourbabaee 
01/23/10
Creative and humorous; yes I can see it on the shelves at the children's book store!
Shilo Goodson
01/25/10
That was a fun story. I can see little kids loving it.
Jan Ackerson
01/26/10
Definitely a sweet children's story.

Purely a matter of personal preference; I'm not wild about 'child angel' stories; they don't seem to fit with the Biblical description of angels as fearsome messengers of God.

That said, I found this delightful, and it's got real potential as a picture book. I can just see the illustrations.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
01/27/10
It was delightful. Jesus loved children, so I could see a Little Angel in heaven. You kept true to the Bible and didn't make the angel a former human. The truth is we don't know all the secrets of heaven. I did have a hard time picturing a crane in Heaven, though. If you go forward with this story, (I think you should), maybe you can create a more heavenly crane. I had vivid pictures in my mind as I read it. You also had an unique prospective. Good job!
Patricia Herchenroether
01/29/10
You are definitely a budding children's writer! You also have the voice of a storyteller. Congratulations.
Charla Diehl
01/29/10
I thoroughly enjoyed this cute story about the first rainbow. It certainly would make a great children's book--I can already see the illustrations. Keep writing!
Congrats on your placement too.
Lisha Hunnicutt
01/30/10
This story deserves a First place! I read it to my daughters and they loved it. You should try to get it published as a picture book. I'd buy it for sure!