The Official Writing Challenge
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A very vivid take on the biblical story. I could see it played out- well done!
This is really lovely. You do a nice job of painting a picture for the reader. For me personally, I'd love to see a bit less adjectives and adverbs and more dialog, thought, and body language. You have a way of pulling the reader in. I think it's a beautiful retelling of the story and really touched my heart.
Wonderful job in content and delivery! My heart was moved with emotions.

Well done,
This is so beautifully written. You grabbed my attention and held it throughout. Well done. Keep writing!
Lovely. Stirred <I>my</I> love for Jesus-- something we as writers hope to accomplish.