The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 766 times
Member Comments
This was a really good story with a powerful message. I really liked it - great job!
God Bless you.
Good message--. Having spent two decades as a Pastor's secretary, this story spoke to me in an usually big way. Well done.
This is very creative!

The topic was specifically geared towards a computer virus, though. I kept looking for some connection to a computer virus or hacker.

Good job,and some good reminders not to get complacent and comfortable in where we are.
Sadly, I think many, if not most, of our churches have a "virus." We need to turn to the Great Physician for the diagnosis and the cure.
Good job!
I'm commenting on my own article, because I know that I am not on target with the topic. I was told that I could write the topic as I see it, and since I know very little about computers except for the actual typing of the stories, I shy away from the true meaning of these topics. (Please God, let them steer away away from computer topics in this New Year!)
I really enjoyed the message in this story. I think it is one that can be seen in many aspects of life, but really hurts when it happens in church.

I noticed in the beginning you started telling the story from Rita's pov then switched to the Pastor then again in the middle a brief glimpse of Rita's POV again. I do this often too and have received comments on it. At first, I thought it shouldn't matter if it is told in the 3rd person. But especially in short stories it can be jarring if the reader thinks the story is going to be from one person's perspective and it is switched to another.

Overall, I thought it was a good story. The beginning drew me in. I could easily picture the pastor on his knees and see his heart hurting. It's also a great reminder that as Christians we really need to be aware of what we are saying. Nice job.
Martha, Sorry but I disagree with your comment. I think you were right on target! You used the challenge to show us another way of looking at what goes on in many of our Churches and just what Jesus wants to do about it!

I loved the story and can see where you were coming from. OK the virus part wasn't about the computer but the analogy was great, I just can't wait to see what happens with the Church.
Congratulations of your piece receiving "highly conmmended" honors!
Congrats - God Bless~
Good story. Pertinent message and with wonderful "medicine" for the answer.