The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/26/15
The book of Ruth is one of many of my favorites. Well done!

God bless~
11/29/15
I liked how you tied together the story of Ruth and your own difficulties in life.

Your story would have more readable if you would have double-spaced between paragraphs.

The other observation I made was that you had several run-on sentences. A run-on sentence is when you join two or more complete sentences with no punctuation or improper punctuation. For example: God is not ever taken b
11/29/15
Sorry, i hit the return key by accident.

For example: God is never taken by surprise; he is present to hear and save those that are his from calamity.

Also, I would cut out some words like indeed that do little to add anything to the story.

I see a lot of promise in your writing and just want to show you how to make it better.
12/02/15
I appreciate your transparency in sharing your feelings about a difficult period in your life. That's the sort of thing that draws readers in. You might consider leading with your story--many readers of devotionals have read the Bible stories many, many times, but have never read your story. That's a good way to hook a reader, and then you can present the biblical lesson to them later in the writing.

You had quite a few words to spare; I would have liked to know even more about the circumstances that almost "crushed" you. In creative nonfiction, you can present those in a narrative fashion--give more details, even include dialogue. Anything that will keep a reader's eyes on your words is a plus.

I had a very difficult time discerning the topic of "grate" in your devotional. It could be inferred, but the idea of the Writing Challenge is to use the prompt more obviously than just an inference that's a bit of a stretch.

Your writing was heartfelt and full of grace, and I appreciated having read it.
I liked the points you made. God knows how important it is for us to have friends and be able to rely on them. Make sure you put the Bible verse in quotation marks. I'd also have enjoyed seeing more of your story and how you related to Naomi. You have a nice start. Keep writing and read and comment on other challenges too. I think if you do these things, you'll blossom and find your place in the writing world.
Perceiving the pain that so affected Naomi that she changed her name to Marah (bitter) was right-on. Then identifying with her pain, and reminding the reader that there is always hope was cool too. Maybe a bit more detail on how you shifted from despair to hope for the reader to latch onto?