The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
This is a great story. Well done!
Gripping story. You did an incredible job with your MC. I could feel her fear, doubt, pain. Your dialogue was strong. The only red ink would be to make sure your story is polished before submitting it. For example, you missed some quotation marks in some of your dialogues. Maybe break up some of your larger paragraphs as well. Overall, very well done.
Great job with the action and development of this story! You held my attention from start to finish.
Wow this is an outstanding story. You grappled my attention in the first line and I found myself holding my breath until the very end. My only red ink is sic my dog was spelled wrong. You gave me goosebumps while delivering a few great messages. You also did great writing on topic in more than one way.
I really enjoyed your story. It kept my interest from the first line and had me riveted until the very end.

The only thing I would suggest is to make sure your punctuation is correct before submitting. I saw several places that were missing commas, but overall it was well deserving of 1st place.
Love this!
Love this!
Congratulations on your 1st place finish, Rachel.

It's good to see the depth of talent from some of the newer writers.
This is such a well-crafted story. Riveting plot, suspense, and great ending makes this story deserving of its third place Best of the Best Contender. Congratulations!
Congratulations on winning the quarter!