The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
05/12/16
My niece lives in Michigan now with her hubby and baby, so I appreciated the story.

Good job with this.

Blessings~
05/13/16
I live in Michigan, but I didn't know there is elk in the U.P. One day Ill have to visit Thunder Bay.

Colleen Coble, an inspirational author, has written several mystery books set in the U,P.
One is titled, "Thunder Bay".
05/13/16
Red ink: in the first para., I think you need a comma separating thoughts as it looks like the elk might be in the tree. I thought you did great at creating the feeling so I could picture myself there.
05/17/16
Excellent writing that conveys the atmosphere as well as the beauty of Michigan. You've taken us with you all the way on your road trip and on your timeline from childhood.
I'll be very surprised if this entry is lacking a ribbon by the end of this week.
This is really quite lovely. You painted a divine picture for the reader and I feel like I can see it through your eyes. My main red ink would be don't use exclamation points unless in dialog. Instead, let your beautiful word choice do the exclaiming for you. I think you nailed the topic and I suspect your family will cherish this story for generations.
05/19/16
Congratulations, Jeremy, on placing 4th place in the Beginners category.
05/19/16
Congrats!

Blessings~