Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Our Mutual Friend (not about the book) (09/15/11)
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TITLE: A Garden Reunion | Previous Challenge Entry
By Keith Murrill
09/22/11 -
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ADD TO MY FAVORITES
Shards of iron and torn flesh buried
Below the splinters
The back of the Father to
Behold once, only once
Rejection by enemy friends
Booing and jostling
For a rubber-neck look to
Behold the wreck of humanity
Staring down at us with love through
Beaten, swollen, peaceful eyes.
They see a nearing end of
Bondage.
Lock-step with prophecy the
Battalion’s unwitting concession to fulfill
The Fathers deepest desires.
Being transformed from breath and dusty scrolls
Into living, bleeding, eternal history
Before the decided and undecided – One
At this moment only.
Bearing ugliness and pain and hate, unbelief and
Chronic forgetfulness
By tooth-jagged rips in flesh comes
A wall of worlds to the ground
Back together again Creator and created
A Garden reunion come through the
Bedraggled centuries of despair and laws, and
Promises, and testing. To this moment
By which the two separated by an eternal rift
Become one.
At last forever.
By our mutual friend.
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But I tell you that my vision differs only to say this...I generally find it hard to grasp the depth of a vision I disagree with...yet, though our vision is different, I was pulled into the depths of your vision with your powerful words and I can only congratulate you on the incredible way you have woven your vision! I may not personally agree with your vision but I think you have done an outstanding job presenting it!
You did a wonderful job illustrating the war that raged that day from onset to victory. However, your descriptions were so elaborate and wrapped so intensely in painful passion that I had to read some lines over again to grasp what you were trying to say. When I backed up to re-read the line I lost the flow.
When compared to the other deeply dramatic descriptions in your writing, the term chronic forgetfulness almost pails in comparison. I was also uncertain about the phrase tooth-jagged rips in flesh. There were moments when I thought I was interpreting correctly but I must admit some of it might have gone right over the top my simple head.
Overall, I will keep this one in my favorites list because it is so unique. There is an obvious power behind your pen, something I like to call anointing. If this is just you beginning, “wow” is all I can say along with God bless you as your pursue the call on your life.