Marriage

---

You won’t read about it in the obituaries in the local paper, or hear about it on the local news, unless you are in the rich and famous category. No, the death of a marriage is not big news for long. Sad, too, because for an institution God invented and personally designed, and He alone can sustain, it is really disregarded by so many.

Even those still married and not contemplating divorce are, sadly, not contemplating the success of their marriage as often as they might. It is something we take for granted. After you say I do, then all too often the decline into the mundane begins. At first, it is just an occasional saying “no” to what is best for us, choosing what is best for me instead. We forget the niceties that won us the heart of our beloved. We forget the courtesies, the gestures of love. We become co-existers in the same home, the same bed.

This morning, I was thinking about little kids and presents on Christmas morning. You know how you search for just the right present to get each child…the one that suits their personality and their interests? You imagine the look on their face when they open the gift. You think of all the ways they will enjoy it. Not very often do we think of the gift lying in a heap in their room, or under their bed covered with dust from disuse. We don’t imagine how cute it will look broken and shattered to pieces.

I wonder if God feels that way when we allow our relationships to fall into disrepair? In many cases, He provided this mate, if we have sought His input in the first place. If we came to Him after the fact, He longs to perfect each of us to become the best for each other. He pulls out his holy repair kit and begins to work on our hearts, if we let him.

But what can He do when we shove our relationships in the corner, or put them “on hold” until the work stresses get less, or the kids get older, or until we move to the perfect house, get the perfect job, etc?

No, this mate that we once had high hopes for is NOT perfect. But neither are we, yet God longs to perfect us, if we allow Him. Since God invented marriage, He really has the answers for how to make it work. We have the questions, He has the answers. Do we have the courage to go past the hurt, past the anger, and ask the questions?

Marriages don’t just suddenly die. They are starved, stomped, beaten down and ignored. They are neglected, abused and disregarded until they can no longer survive.

Sometimes it is because a newer, improved version of Mr or Mrs Perfect has come along, but even that cries ME, ME, ME instead of We, We, We. When we said “I do” – it should really be “we do” – when “I” gets off the throne of our heart to make way for “us” to dwell there.

Lord, breathe a fresh breath of life in the marriages that are struggling. Revive the cold ambers of the fires that once burned brightly. For when a marriage dies, it never truly rests in peace. Heartache, regret, sorrow, pain, anger, and doubt shroud the casket forever.

---

PLEASE ENCOURAGE AUTHOR BELOW LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE