Humor

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Reverse Presidential Psychology
©
by

Stephen A. Peterson


One a hot July evening, President Bill Clinton walked into a bar then ordered an extra dry martini. He took a single sip of the martini, then threw the rest of the drink in the nearest bar maid’s face. Before the bar maid could recover from the shock, the young woman began to cry.

“Darn!” said the President. “I’m so very sorry. Every time I order up an extra dry martini I end up throwing it into the face of the most beautiful woman I see. I guess I’m sick or something. Heck, I don’t know.”

Far from being angry, the bar maid was empathetic. Wiping the remaining liquid off her face, she suggested the President see a psychologist.

“Mr. President, sir, I happen to have the name of a very good psychologist. A lot of my real good friends see her. They swear by her, sir. She’s really, really good, Mr. President!”

The bar maid wrote down the analyst’s name then gave it to the President. Satisfied the President took the psychologist’s name, paid his bar tab and left with a single Secret Service agent.

The bar maid smiled then whistled a happy tune believing that she did her country and the President a good deed. As she just knew that the President had a serious psychological problem.

Eight months later, the President was back in the bar again. Recognizing the President, the bar maid asked, “Good Evening, Mr. President! Did you see my psychologist friend?” as she ordered an extra dry martini for the President.

“Yep! But I never had sex with that woman!!! I just saw that lady psychologist five times a week. Yep, she’s a looker!” He took a sip of the martini then threw the remaining liquid in the bar maid’s face.

Stunned the bar maid wiped her face with the sleeve of her dress. “Well, I guess the psychologist did not do anything good for you, Mr. President.”

“Oh, not really! She’s done a great job,” responded the President.

“But you threw your drink in my face just like you did the first time! So how did she help you?” exclaimed the bar maid.

“Yeah, I know. I learned that it’s all relative. It depends upon how you define it. There’re no absolutes. I’m naturally good. I’m really cute and the President. So it doesn’t embarrass me no more,” replied the President.

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