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A Gracious Father
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Psalm: 23:4 – “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me”.
I want to share this story of my life and how God helped me get through the toughest times of my life.
In April 2012, I was diagnosed with a life threatening disease “Tuberculosis” which was caused due to pollution and also my health was easily affected because of poor immunity. Right from my childhood I always had frequent visits to the doctor and medications and at one point I became numb to that pain. Many times I questioned God why do you still keep me in this world and for what reason; I definitely don’t like the frequent visits to the doctor or go through physical illness.
I was in a shock when the doctors told me I had tuberculosis, I thought my time had come for me to go to my Heavenly Father. But that was not His plan, He in turn wanted me to learn to rely on Him during those difficult times and know that He’s the Lord of my life and I am no one to decide if I should live or die. The doctor gave me so many medications for day and night and I couldn’t handle the pain of the medications. It was equal to radiation and was hard for me to pass by every day because I was weak and became slow in doing things at work. It was hard to go to work and be under this medication, the worst part was my boss noticed I was very slow in doing things at work and I would forgot things so easily and it looked like at that time if I didn’t perform better I would be replaced. I was weeping inside and I couldn’t handle the emotional, mental and physical stress and pain. I wanted to find a way through but my only way was God himself.
I used to be breathless at night and it felt like I might die anytime and would have so much pain in my breast bone which was another complication that arouse during the time I had tuberculosis. The doctor diagnosed and said my breast bone is swollen and that condition is called as “T- Syndrome” and it would require medication. I had to take medications in addition to the tuberculosis treatment and that was the last thing I wanted. Seriously my life was not getting any better at that time. I was under a lot of pain, weak and stressed. I was so disturbed by the fact that a young girl in 20’s would have to go through this and I felt I needed trauma counselling at some point. But God never forsake me, He stood by me and let me pass through every difficulty. As father who sits by his baby’s hospital bed, He sat with me all throughout and comforted me and gave me hope that I would be fine. His grace carried me through, His peace made me calm; His presence in my life gave me joy in spite of my pain.
He walked me through every phase of my life and this was one among it. He held my hand during every visit to the doctor, He held me close, He gave His word of comfort. I love my Heavenly Father for being there for me. Till today I don’t know how I passed every day but I know I have my Heavenly Father with me who gives His grace. I successfully completed my treatment for one year and on the last day of the treatment with fingers crossed I went to the doctor to know the result. He just looked at me and said “There’s no trace of tuberculosis”. I was so over joyed knowing my God healed me, and most importantly He led me through the toughest times of my life. I knew the love of my Heavenly Father that day.
There’s nothing that comes into my life without my Father’s knowledge. He brought me into this world to be a witness of His goodness and grace. And I am very honored to know that I was able to be that some one to be a witness for God no matter how difficult it was for me to take the next step. I know my God will never fail me. He’s my healer, my creator and Father.
There’s a line that came to my mind when I was writing this article, it’s a line from the song “Lay me down” and the line is “It will be my joy to say your will your way”. Yes, I will always do according to my Father’s will in my life because I know I am safe in His arms. The Lord has taught me to trust His plan for me no matter how the future may look bleak to me. He’s the one who formed me in my mother’s womb and I know He’s there with me looking me at me and saying “ I am here my child right by your side and I am not going anywhere”.
I want to tell you there’s a Father in Heaven who loves you and is waiting for you to run to Him. He’s waiting there with His arms wide open to hold you and rescue you. I am a tuberculosis survivor and it’s all because of my Heavenly Father hand of healing. The Lord is with you every step of your life and it may look like you are going nowhere. At that point, don’t give up hope, your future is safe in God’s hands because He formed you in your mother’s womb and He has worked out His amazing plan for your life. You are where you are supposed to be, He will raise the Lazarus in You one day and that will be a huge blessing in Your life and for those around you.Trust Him and His plan! Delay is never denial! God is a call away!
Dear Abba Father in Heaven,
We thank you for giving us the privilege of coming to your presence and for the privilege of calling us as Your own. Father, Help us during our difficult times and hold us close. You are a faithful Father and help us to always feel Your love around us. Be our guide, joy, hope, comfort, love and healer. In Jesus Christ name. Amen.
God bless you.
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