Psalm: 46:5 – “God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved”.
Having Christ in our lives makes it more beautiful, less complicated and stress free because He knows how to handle us and our situations. His beauty and radiance is shines through us and that brings out the unique beauty of God in us. It doesn't matter whether we are fat or thin, tall or tiny, we reflect Christ in us and none of the negatives in our lives will bother us because "He lives in us and we shall not be moved".
I spoke about how God helped me overcome tuberculosis and I want to share how God helped me understand being beautiful inside and out, once He became the anchor of my life. He became an anchor that pulls me back to Him when I fall, an anchor that doesn't let me move away, an anchor which reminds me I am rooted in God. It is truly a privilege being the daughter of a King.
So after my treatment, my body started to gain a lot of weight. And me being a person, who is so conscious about maintaining weight and being fit, couldn't just swallow the fact that I gained many pounds. It was weird to look every time at the mirror, a swollen - double chin face. I became less interested in making myself look good, which means all the fancy makeup out of my beauty closet and less interested in shopping. I tried so hard to reduce my weight by eating very less, tried on detox drinks, green tea and even exercised. But my body was too weak to take in all that pressure and I became more tired and really frustrated about my weight. I just couldn't reduce my weight and it would hurt so much to see that I didn't fit in my old clothes or the clothes that look so good in the shops. I couldn't buy them because it would look so hideous on a fat girl. After all that emotions, I found online shopping as a solution because it was easier.
The most disturbing moments were numerous times being picked on in every family get together and weddings for being the fat one. It was just heart breaking and I became a person who would doubt her own worth. And so many times I wanted to say, “I didn’t choose on being fat”. And running to the rest room to just cry out to the Lord helped me just calm down.
Then God made me realize something that I am beautiful inside and outside and talking about being beautiful inside is because of the compassion and love that I have on others. I inherited His traits of being compassionate on people who deserve it and He helped me start a small organization last year called “Be somebody’s angel” and it was a success for the two causes we were able to support. God didn’t choose me determining the way I looked, He chose me even before I was born. He loves me for who I am and the way I look. And an experience 2 months back made me feel how special and beautiful I look in God’s eyes and that I don’t have to please Him to be His favourite.
One night as I was praying for God to help me with something and was much burdened and when I began reading the word of God, He spoke to me from Psalm: 45:13 – “The king's daughter is all glorious within the palace: her clothing is of woven gold”. Isn’t it beautiful to hear these words from your Heavenly Father who just loves you so much. The Lord has walked with me in various stages of my life as a Father would hold his little daughter’s hand when she cannot cross the road all by herself.
Friend, God loves you for who you are. He knew you even before you were formed in your mother’s womb. He knows your strength and weakness and He will never let you walk alone. I encourage you to ask for God’s help and leading in your life when it is hard to take the next step. Let no one determine your worth, you are a royal diadem in the hand of your God (Isaiah: 62:3). Be strong, the God who helped me find my worth in Him will help you.
Dear Heavenly Father,
I thank You for this beautiful time that You have given us to come before Your presence anytime. We thank You for being the Father of our lives. We pray that You will help us find our path which leads to You and help us to be more like You. Be our guide and guard us. In Jesus Christ name. Amen.
God bless you.