Christian Living

WITNESSING TO FAMILY

by Charles (Chuck) Robey
02/16/16
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"Conduct yourselves with wisdom toward outsiders, making the most of the opportunity. Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned, as it were, with salt, so that you may know how you should respond to each person," (Col. 4:5-6).

The last command Jesus gave his followers, before being lifted up into heaven, was for them to be a witnesses for Him. A witness throughout the whole world (Acts 1:8), which definitely  includes our family. And witnessing to family members is the most difficult task of personal evangelism (Matthew 13:57). There are several reasons for this :

1-Our family knows us best, as we are the only Bible they may read

2-Our family will tend to be more critical, than total strangers, as they feel comfortable talking with family.

3-Our family  is more likely to give a rhetorical or angry response, as they feel more at easy in talking with us. .

4- Our family is more apt to complain later,  if the gospel doesn't stick as they think it should. Or, that the results are not what we advertised.

5- We are fearful of doing anything that would jeopardize our family harmony.  

So, what's the answer, in witnessing to the family. And,  how do we approach our family members ? Basically, our personal experience of coming to Christ, seems to work best. We should simply be honest in relating our conversion experience. Telling how God's free grace saved us, through our faith, and it was nothing that we did on our own. We just realized that we were a sinner, in need of divine help (Ephesians 2:8-9), as God did it all on the cross (John 3:16-17).

 Then follow these guidelines:

 BE CAREFUL AND BE CAUSUAL. So, how do we talk to family ? Very carefully ! Don't be  caustically minded.  Remember, our family members are no strangers, so don't talk to them as a stranger. Just talk like you would over the evening meal. Do not pound  the scripture in fast and furious. Or come across like the preverbal police interrogator. In other words, just talk to them like your family. Relating the advantages of your personal relationship with Christ is a starter. And continue with the eternal results, good and bad (Hebrews 9:27-28).

 It's much better to have a family member say, " Please tell me again about your faith in Jesus Christ," rather than you saying, "Sit down. I want to talk to you." Just commit them to prayer, by asking for the convicting power of God's Holy Spirit.

BE HONEST. If your relationship is a good one, never beat around the bush, so to speak. Be straightforward, yet  respectful. Say something like, " Dad, Mom, you know me and trust me don't you ? Because I love you more than anything thing or anyone else in this world, I'm concerned about you future. Not your secular future, but where you plan to spend eternity, when you die. And you know I would not steer you wrong, don't you ?  Have you ever given any thought to this ?" Please let me share my faith in Christ with you". Most importantly, if they refuse, don't give up.  Tell them you are praying for them, and will be ready to talk again, at anytime.

 ALWAYS BE TRUTHFUL. Never water down the gospel. You probably will not say it in the same way, as you would with a complete stranger on the street, but you must say the truth (Romans 1:16). Remember the power of the gospel, is not in you, but in God (Hebrews 4:12), through the convicting power of the Holy Spirit (John 16:8). 

REMEMBER YOUR RELATIONSHIP. Don't ever forget your place on the family tree. Be careful to respect your elders. The older family members have probably forgotten more than you will ever know about secular life. The elders probably grew up in a time when spiritual manners were considered personal. And religion and politics  were often avoided. So, pick the place and the time, to talk to Dad or grandpa. And when God does open the door, quickly walk in, as you may not have another chance.  

And chances are that the younger family members, have already heard and excepted the gospel, through Sunday school or youth rally's.

PREPARE FOR STERN UNBELIEF. This is the hardest hurdle to overcome. Especially in the elderly. After all, they have lived a good life and enjoyed the fun. Nothing has happened to them, and nothing will happen. They will just  die out, at some point in time. How sad this may be.

So then,  if  a family member is adamant in stating they don't believe in any aspect of the hereafter, then simply respond by say something like this, " Well, if you were to die, after excepting Christ, and the  whole idea behind the gospel  turned out to be false, what exactly have you lost' ? Nothing !

And by the same token, if you were to die, after excepting Christ, and the whole idea behind the gospel turned out to be real, what have you gained ?  Eternity with God of course.

Then again, if you happen to die, without excepting Christ, what have you gained ?, An eternity of a literal suffering and torment in the lake of fire, where even a worm never dies.

Observation ! Does any one person  think he, or she, can usurp God's, sovereign will for this universe ? The God who simply spoke the world into place. I think not ! In other words, just because one doesn't believe in a hereafter, doesn't make it any less real. God is all powerful. He is love, but He also cannot overlook evil. He will reward good (2 Peter 3:9), and he will diffidently punish evil (Revelation 20:13-15) . 

BE PREPARED FOR SACRIFICE. Sad to say, however, we must be ready to lose everything for the sake of the gospel. That is if you love your family, as I feel you do (Matthew 22:37-40), This is a sacrificial love (John 15:13). In other words, to refuse to share the gospel with family, because you feel it may cost your relationship, is to love yourself more than you love them. 

CONCLUSION. Witnessing to family has never been easy. We must mimic the mind of Christ. Be kind, be patient, be honest and show respect. Above all, pray a lot, and don't give up. Trust God's sovereign power, to bring them to Him.

 AUTHOR'S POST SCRIPT

If I had  a one word psychology , of effective witnessing, it would be  "Process". You see, witnessing is a process.  A process of  continually seeking God's leadership, a process of continual learning, and a process of  talking with people.  The following tips  are given to enhance this  witnessing process.

Do's of Witnessing !

Pray often, seeking God's Holy Spirit's convicting power. Be familiar with the scriptures. Be positive in your witness. Keep your witness simple. Have a genuine love for the lost. Use simple Bible terms in talking. Be ready to learn from the conversation. Be sure to listen attentively. Be ready to give simple answer to their questions. Be patient and  gentle. Be ready  to let them save face. Bring them to a possible decision about their salvation. Encourage them to study the Bible. And remember, you must have to have a testimony, in order to witness (1 John 4:4)  

Don'ts of Witnessing

Never attack directly , make fun,  belittle another or come on to strong.  Never  jump from one subject to another.  Never expect too  much from  the person. Don't have a spiritual chip on your shoulder. Don't lose patience. Don't get into a doctrinal argument. Don't get sidetracked in defending your denomination. Don't ever assume an outcome. Don't speak too fast, speak unclear, or be too forceful.

I pray these brief  do's and don'ts have brought to your attention areas that will help in your witness. And above all, pray and ask God to work in your heart. Especially, when it comes to family interaction.