Healing

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Oh but for the Mercy and Grace of God do I have the joy of Eternal life.

Perchance, I recall the days of my past more often than needed. My mind treks back into a period of time that I am not satisfied with, nor acclaim as one worthy of forgiveness.

My parents, both Christians raised me to be God fearing and God obedient, conversely, I went in paths that I knew in my heart I should not travel. My mother and daddy pleaded with me to accept the love of Christ, and the Salvation he would bestow upon me if only I would ask. I tried to satisfy my parents and grandmother. One Sunday evening I went to church with my mother and grandmother, I’ll never the fire and brimstone preaching or the singing during the alter call. I don’t recall exactly the sermon, but I recall the song with passion. “I’ve wandered far away from God, now I’m coming home. The path of sin to long I’ve trod Lord I’m coming home. I began weeping because I felt the impact of that song deep inside my being. My grandmother standing next to me took my hand and asked if I would like to go to the alter and pray. I shook my head yes, and through sobs asked her to go with me. The distance from my seat to the alter seemed to be miles. In the meantime Satan whispered in my ear telling me I was making a wrong decision. I knelt at the alter, tears streaming down my face, and asked Jesus to come into my life and deliver me from the path of sin I was traveling. I felt nothing! Nothing but the warm tears streaming down my face and total confusion that enveloped my mind.

I expected God to hit me with a lighting rod, or tap me on the shoulder...anything to prove His presence. When he didn't, I convinced myself that I was unworthy to receive God’s gracious mercy and forgiveness. I believed I was unforgivable and unlikely to ever have Salvation.Undeserving of his love, I thought he must only apply Salvation to those who are "good." I found no reason to hinder my desires which again would put me back on the path I hadpreviously trod. The path my mother referred to as, my roadway to destruction. And that it was!

Rather than compound my sins which were many, I would rather elaborate on the glory of God and His forgiving power. It was not on the pathway, but certainly on the roadway to destruction when I felt the power of God. I was in a semi-truck accident. The brakes failed on a seven percent grade. There was no run-off ramp and if I hit the guard rail and broke thru,infinity awaited me. To cut the chase, the trucks speed, pushed by a heavily loaded trailer, exceeded 120 MPH. By no degree of imagination did I for once think I would live through the discernable crash. The trucks Rpm’s were screaming and the indicator needle had totally disappeared. My enormous concern was directed toward the safety of other travelers on the highway.
However, spinning in the back of my mind, though concerned for others was my need for Jesus. I did not want to die without knowing Him.

I screamed! Louder than the deafening sounds made by the fast rolling truck tires hitting the pavement.

Just moments before hitting a bolder the size of a three-story building, I screamed, from the most inner-parts of my being, “God, have mercy on me.”

In Matthew when the leaper went to Jesus and asked Jesus to heal him, Jesus said, “I will.” I believe that day, when I reckoned Him to have mercy on me, He said, “I will.”

Being saved does not merit perfection, therefore, the life I live has no facsimiles’ of perfection. Numerous times I fail at my aspirations which are to excel in earthly matters. In the past, if I fell to the bottom, I had to climb out, by my own choice,alone . Today,I feel a nail scared hand beckoning me to come unto Him and He will give me rest. I thank Him for the compassion He bestowed upon me in my desperate hour, when I recognized in a flash I would spend eternity in hell without Him, He came to me, right on time.

Today, and if I’m blessed with more tomorrows, my greatest joy is knowing that I know,I have an eternal home in God’s household. God don’t have to use a lighting rod to prove his point…sometimes it’s a three-story boulder.

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