The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
03/02/07
Very sad and disturbing story that probably holds all too much truth. I did notice a few mechanical errors, mostly in punctuation, but at least one grammatical, too. Otherwise your piece was well-written and thought-provoking.
Interesting story here. Would to God we could rescue all from their fate. Sometimes, just telling the story helps.
Your detailed description of the sweatshop was wonderful. I could almost see it and smell it. Great job.
03/12/07
Hi CeCe. I judged this topic and was impressed with your visual writing. The paragraph beginning with "No one dared...", however, is all telling instead of showing. Keep honing your writing skills. I see a lot of potential in you.