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TITLE: Now that your 50
By Leann Mabrey
10/20/09
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Again, this is to be funny. I wrote this for my dad when he turned 50. Hope it cracks you up because I laughed the whole time I wrote it, and then I had to read it!!

Yes my dad did laugh. my parents have a very good sense of humor.
Now that your 50
Remember your teeth will fall out without warning,
and you have to fish them out of a bowl every morning.
You can only eat pureed meat
and for breakfast it's cream of wheat.
You have to be careful how big you smile,
Don't worry, you'll get used to it after a while.
You'll probably drool a little bit,
but whatever you do... don't spit!
Your teeth could fly out and put out an eye.
So Please Don't Spit

Now that your 50
Remember your bones are getting brittle
be careful not to fall, and walk close to the wall.
You could break a hip with just a slip.
At your age that's not something little.
When your outside and you feel some drips
crawl if you must, just don't slip
Can't be too careful with your old hips
So Please Please....Don't slip

Now that your 50...
Cover your head when your out of bed
Rogaine is pricey, and may not work on your old head
But being bald has one good perk
You dont' have to worry about your cowlick when your late for work
So take care of your hair, you have little to spare.
Please, please, please...take care of your hair

Don't get discouraged when you go out walking
and you feel your struggling to get to the top of the hill
Remember, it will get easier now.
Cause now that your 50, your up and OVER THE HILL!!!
Don't get mad and don't be sad
I'm sure you'll find something nifty
about being fifty!
Don't worry, fret or pout
Just a few more years till you get the senior citizen discount!!
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