Healing
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“My command is this: love each other as I have loved you”
(John 15:12).
In the calendar of quotes given to me as my first ‘official’ ‘Mother’s Day’ gift, I found a quote that spoke to me quite strongly. It was so strong that I chose it as one of the quotes to use at the ‘get-together’ in the church hall after Javin’s dedication service. I printed it in bold and stuck it onto a card (A3) among other cards with information about Javin. The quote says: “Love…it begins with a moment that grows richer and brighter…and becomes a lifetime of joy.” Profound!
At the time, I was thinking of the moment when Vince first asked me out on a date (shortly after his 24th birthday). I thought about the proposal…the acceptance…the wedding…Javin…altogether bringing joy into our lives. But today, when I read that quote I saw many other moments adding to that joy.
I went back to the moment when my grandparents made a choice to care for a helpless baby girl, born to their teenage daughter. I saw love in action there. I could not have seen that had I not looked back and reflected on my early years. It was a selfless act--one I had no understanding of in order to truly appreciate before it was too late. My grandparents are no longer alive and many times it makes me sad but that’s life! Sometimes we’ll be happy and other times we’ll be sad. However, the lessons they have taught me lives on, producing good fruits in my life. That makes me happy to have been blessed with them as my carers. It helps to ignite the joy in me which is always there regardless of times of sadness or happiness. Love never fails!
From the love of those two individuals a family was extended. In addition to my mother, they had four other children. A source of love for me also as I was connected with many other families once they had their families and their grown children had their families also. I got to know and experience the love of my Aunt Sadie and her family, my dearly departed Aunt Grace and her family, my Uncles Hervin and Donald and their family. I was also connected to a community and a ‘church’ family.
In looking back, it taught me that we are all connected to each other and that God created us for relationships. We were never meant to be alone without a family to demonstrate to us God’s amazing love. His original plan was for us all to experience His love but even those of us who have entered this world outside of a nuclear family He has provided a way for us. God said that He will never leave us nor forsake us and I am a living testimony of that promise. He continues to provide for me in all areas of my life.
As I count my blessings today, I realise that I could have allowed all the negatives to destroy me but I chose to allow the love of Christ to be my guide. I thank God for allowing my grandparents to impart such knowledge unto me that now helps to ignite the joy in me.
Although the relationship between my mother and I as well as my siblings have been strained, the love that my grandparents shared and the knowledge they imparted have found me on a journey of getting to know my mother and my sisters much better than I had the opportunity to do before.
Love is that moment when I realised that my mother did the best that she could with her given circumstance. Despite the condemnation she would have received, from some of the people she was connected to, she chose to carry me to full-term and gave birth to me. It takes courage to do the right thing even with a bad situation.
The quote “Love…it begins with a moment that grows richer and brighter…and becomes a lifetime of joy” was chosen to celebrate Javin’s arrival as we dedicated him to God. He represents the love we share or in other words the love we have for each other (another way of looking at the quote, ‘…and the two became one.’) but we never thought that God would send a child to teach us about His unconditional love. How profound!
Amazing love! I chose to do the opposite of what my mother did and I found true love. Unfortunately, my mother missed out on the wonderful lessons that God wanted her to learn through child-rearing but fortunately, for me, I chose to learn from her mistakes rather than to follow the path she led. The sin was in the act done to her and not in the life that was being formed in the womb that would one day grow up to honour…worship…and serve the Giver of life.
Today, I’m able to use my experience to help others who are in similar situations to understand that there is life after the pain. So if you have suffered in any way, from parental neglect or have struggled with resentment, may I encourage you to seek out the positive aspects of that situation and use it as a stepping stone towards your healing, then use your experience to help others come out of the mess that they find themselves in. There is a positive to find in each negative situation, seek it out and when you find it give thanks for that positive and allow it to lift you a little higher out of the pit that you are in. Eventually, you will find your way out.
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus”
—1Thessalonians 5:18 (NIV).
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