Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: Allowed - Aloud (01/05/23)
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TITLE: There is Hope There is Healing, a Monologue | Previous Challenge Entry
By Laurie Kiel
01/12/23 -
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I had a perfect life. I was married to the richest man in the country. I had everything and best of all, in a culture where a woman’s value came only from her children, my richest treasure by far was my ten children.
My life was a dream, that became a nightmare.
Loss after loss after loss rocked our perfect lives.
Seven thousand sheep, gone
three thousand camels, gone
five hundred yoke of oxen gone
five hundred donkeys gone
Each of them with a group of servants all but one servant each time gone
But worst of all, my children — gone. My children were dead. Every single one of them. Ten painful births with Job unable to share that pain of birth, and now ten painful deaths and he didnt seem to be sharing in that pain either. Why? Why? Why did this happen? The word howls through my head and heart like a ravenous wolf.
And then to watch the physical agony of my husband. You know, I think it's harder to watch a loved one suffer than to suffer myself. How can Job sit silently there in the ashes, scraping his boils with a piece of broken pottery. How appropriate. That pottery was as broken as our lives.
There was one person in my life who could have held me and grieved with me and I couldn’t even touch him..
And he just silently endures. The words rip out of my mouth and soul almost against my will. “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!” Job 2:9 NIV
Job looks at me with wounded eyes. Was I the one who had brought this down on our head?. I just want it to be over. I want Job's pain to stop. I want my pain to stop. How long was he going to put up with this.
You all probably know Job's response to me. He told me I was talking like a foolish woman and asked "Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?"
Job 2:10 NIV.
Did you notice that my husband, such a good man, better than I deserved, didn't call me a foolish woman. He told me I was TALKING like a foolish woman.
My pain had caused me to forget who I was, I wasn't a foolish woman. I wasn't a woman unloved by God, unloved by my husband. But at the time all I could think was “How could God love us, look what He had allowed to happen.”
And Job turned away from me. And I became a grieving, silent witness — watching, wondering when would this ever end.
I silently listen and let the words between Job and God seep deep into my wounded heart. And I watched and wondered as God unfolded His restoration.
But there is hope, there is healing, there is God. I’ll always have the consequences for my words, to be forever known only as the woman who kicked her husband when he was down. but God is good. God forgives God restores If you’ve read the end of the story, you knowJob had ten more children.
Who do you think had the joy of giving birth to those children?
When words of grief rip out of your soul
Where once there was fullness there is now a huge hole
When you cry aloud
How was this ever allowed?
When disaster leaves you reeling
There is hope there is healing
There is God
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