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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: YOUTH (04/04/19)
An almost-closed bud on a bush
With tears of morning dew
Was crying to a sister bloom,
“Why can’t I be like you?

You’re big and bright and beautiful
With petals all unfurled,
While I’m inside a covering
That’s all around me curled.

I cannot view the world at all.
In fact, all I have seen
Is you above me on the shrub,
Your face all framed in green.

It isn’t fair that I’m so young,
So colorless and small.
I want to be a brilliant red,
Admired by one and all.”

The rose on branch above her said,
“Stop wishing you were older.
Too soon you’ll leave your safe cocoon
For someone’s flower holder.

Before that, winds will blow on you,
And pounding rains will bruise you,
And passersby will cut your stem
And otherwise abuse you.

And when you’re grown up, you will have
Responsibility
For sweet scent and for loveliness
Wherever you may be.”
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This article has been read 746 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Joanney Uthe 
04/11/19
How very true. We all can relate to wishing to be older, especially if we have older siblings. And how many of us wish to be young again! This was a very creative and cute way of revealing this truth.
David Butler
04/13/19
A well-crafted and well-thought-through piece. Good metering and very good message, without falling back on slanting verse.
Well done.
Barbara Culler 
04/13/19
Not to mention that when the bud's time has come to fully bloom, the other rose will have been spent. Great take on the topic!
Noel Mitaxa 
04/14/19
Very creative approach to the topic. I also admire how you stuck to the theme - as it might have been easy to 'branch' out... ;-)
Mariane Holbrook
04/14/19
Beautifully done! And great words of wisdom, too. Your meter is perfect as is the rest of your delightful poem.
Laurie Glass 
04/16/19
What a creative take on the topic. Very nice poem with a meaningful message. Well done!
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
04/16/19
Wow this is beyond brilliant. The poems are really grabbing my heart this week. I thought of this lesson when I heard the topic, about how we spend our lives wishing it away. I could never had delivered the message as beautifully and powerfully as this beautiful poem did.
Betty Castleberry
04/18/19
Super creative. Love the personification of the roses. Lovely meter and rhyme as well. Thumbs up.
Robin Newberger
04/18/19
This lovely poem made me smile from the first stanza. Such a creative piece and handling of the topic. Well done!