The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Wonderful poem. Excellent retelling of a bible story. I don’t know much about poetry, but yours is the kind I like. I know it is very difficult to get the correct meter and rhyme. You did it very well.
The pace and the rhythm of this piece is almost hypnotic. I marvel at the talent it takes to be this descriptive and precise with so few words per stanza.

Just a beautiful example of master craftsmanship.
Great job on this poem. I enjoyed seeing the story unfold in a way that I've never pictured before.
I could picture the whole scene, and the contrast really comes through. It’s today’s world as well everywhere we go. I loved your idea and it’s execution!
A great message here, Ellen. I loved the way that you told it as a narrative with the three main characters. I could visualise the scene. Well done.