Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: COMPUTER (05/19/16)
- TITLE: Chit-Chat
By PamFord Davis
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Maybe you’ve heard of my father. Forgive the pun; he was big as a barn door. Seriously, I am a midget in comparison but following in his steps, I must make large strides. Shouldn’t complain, he had much tougher times from critics. Wish he was still around today. He’d be mighty proud to see how well the name is respected. Listen to me, not letting you get in a word. The guys back in the office call me a know it all.
Where did you say you’re from?
China? How about that? Me, too!
Okay if we park it here a while? I saw electric outlets. It’s been a really long day and I’m drained.
It’s nice to be needed but that girl you saw me with… Frankly, she takes me for granted. It makes no difference if its day or night; she expects me to obey her every command. I acquiesce…
What’s that? Not you, too!
I’ll let you in on a little secret. Last week, I crashed in her pad! That’s right; I refused to do what she wanted. I remained silent with a blank expression on my face, showed no response at all. She was frantic.
Bet you’re wondering what followed.
After I whipped her into frenzy I came back to life; as good as new!
She can’t live without me. Boy, did she appreciate me after that. She told everybody. That girl was like a boy with a shiny new bicycle!
Oh, I know not to act out too often. She has threatened to ditch me several times. Supposedly, it was an apple that Satan used to tempt Eve. It’s the new slim line apple that I worry about; pretty tempting to a girl with cheating on her mind.
Look at her, oblivious to her surroundings. That woman is addicted to text. Is there a Texts Anonymous in this city? And that wannabe she holds in her palm… Excuse me; smart or not, it’s a phone! Okay, so it’s got bells & whistles but it also can be replaced.
Huh? No, I hadn’t noticed that hooded guy scoping us out. Yikes; he gives me the willies. He’s coming our way. Where’s security when you need them?
Hey, stop that! Turn me loose! Get your clammy hands off of me!
Help, police! Help! I’m being hacked! I have never felt so violated and I will never be the same.
Now what? Mac, Mac; he’s reaching for you! I’m so sorry. I think my chatting got you into this. This was premeditated; he has a backpack to store us in.
Where is that girl? Hello… I’m being stolen!
Wait… Yes, wishes do come true! Someone witnessed the heist and notified in-house detectives!
Alright, that’s more like it; whew! Cuffed and being carried away! What? They are taking us too! If only the texting queen would look this way."
“Officers, officers, wait! I left my laptop here a minute ago but now it’s gone! I know it was foolish and I’m so embarrassed. Do you have any idea where it might be? Honest, I’ve learned my lesson; I’ll take it with me from now on. Did that guy steal it? Is that why you have him?”
“What’s your name, lady? To answer your questions; yes, it appears that we do have your man. We’ll need a full description of your computer. He has not one but two in his backpack. Best that you come with us to the office and we’ll try to straighten this out.”
“But, I’ll miss my plane!"
“Do you want your computer or not? You might catch a later flight. It’s up to you. Guess we could ship it to your home address.”
“No, I won’t miss my plane! I’m on the way to a fashion show in Paris. I’ve been toying with the idea of getting a new laptop; this is the perfect excuse. I’ll just give my boyfriend a sob story and get him to foot the bill. If I play my cards right, he might think I’ve been traumatized. I’ll milk it for all it’s worth!”
“Whatever. We'll need your contact information."
“Okay, sure. Here's my business card."
Meanwhile, in the backpack…
“What is that putrid smell? I’m having a Mac attack!”
“Our hacker packed a lunch. Limburger cheese!”
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