Someone Had to be First | Previous Challenge Entry

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TITLE: Someone Had to be First | Previous Challenge Entry
By Wilma Schlegel
06/04/14
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"There was a feeling of something. It was like a nudge, this unstoppable need to answer. I thought others felt it, too. Someone had to be first of course, but I was not trying to be that one."

"Tekoa said that he felt stuck, but when he heard me, he cried out too. Then Naphtali, Tiras and Peleg. They all claim it was I they heard and I who made up their minds."

"Then it was so loud that it seemed everyone in the world was crying, demanding, 'Crucify him. Crucify him!'"

" And I was the first."

"We had already said to set Barabbas free, was that not enough? Why this passion for violence and blood? I had nothing against this man, I was caught up in the moment. I did not mean it! I was only in the city for the feast of unleavened bread, how could I know what was to happen? Again, I say, I did not mean it!"

With this, Talmai lowered his head to his hands and wept sorely and long. When he looked up again, his eyes were wild with fear.

"My voice was first! They cried out because of me. Do you not understand what that must mean? I am lost. I have no hope. They did crucify Him you know. It was an event like none the world has seen before. That is why I know I am doomed. Do you know the world went dark when He'd breathed his last?"

"Oh great and holy Jehovah, what have I done? I am lower than Cain and more cursed, for I have caused them to kill your son. There is nowhere for me to hide. Oh that the land would open up and swallow me." Talmai tore his clothes and threw himself prostrate on the ground. He wept and would not rise up.

For weeks Talmai dragged himself around the city this way. He hardly ate and could not sleep. He told his story to everyone and to no one, searching for hope, expecting none. No one was able to help him. Some thought he was a lunatic, some thought his pain was too deep, most were too consumed and confused with the events of the past weeks to care about one such as he.

Then came the day when he heard a man speaking about this Jesus.

"This man was delivered over to you by God's deliberate plan and foreknowledge,"(Acts 2:23a, NIV) the speaker was saying.

"God's foreknowledge? God knew what I would do! I am surely lost." Talmai backed away.

"And you, with the help of wicked men put Him to death by nailing him to the cross."(Acts 2:23b, NIV) said the speaker.

"My agony knows no end" Talmai cried.

"But God raised Him from the dead, freeing Him from the agony of death. It was impossible for death to keep its hold on Him."(Acts 2:24, NIV)

"He is alive?!!!! I must have lost my mind as well as my hope now. He is speaking craziness. Can this be true?" and Talmai crept closer. "What does this mean?"

The crowd was thick. Talmai hardly noticed. He moved through it as though drawn to a distant and saving light. The crowd did not hold him back. Some thought he was a lunatic, some thought his pain was too deep, most were too consumed and confused with the events of the past weeks to care about one such as he.

It is said that about three thousand persons were saved that day. Who is to say where in that number Talmai fell? No one could really know for sure, but we know that those who are forgiven much, love much. It isn't important whether he was first or last, but that he understood the call and accepted the gift. Yet, this time he had an urgent desire to know Jesus... and someone had to be first of course.

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