The Official Writing Challenge
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I like the way you wove this story together so seamlessly. I must admit I didn't know who the MC was at first--but what a way to present the Holy Spirit and make Him tangible to the reader. Great work with this one.
A chilling story.

I was a bit confused at first, thinking it was about childbirth. Then thought it was some historical torture chamber story.

Very vivid word pictures- especially the corpse of sin
Very creative and convicting. a bit confusing in content. I liked it, nice job!
This is a great story. I was eager to keep reading and to learn more. Great message.
Very interesting story. I have to admit that the name Marty didn't seem to fit to me. Other than that I found this story captivating.
I was a little confused at the beginning but like the way the story unfolded. Interesting how you derived the name Hamartia Kai Thanatos from Romans 5:12.
Wow! I know you said this wasn't allegorical in the story, but this is a great allegorical story! :D Awesomely written!