The Official Writing Challenge
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God can work rapidly in a person's life but often times He touches hearts through a slow building awareness. In the space of just 750 words, you managed to convey that growing connection in your MC without offering a sudden, forced ending. Strong introduction, well developed MC and a well timed conclusion -- great job!
My first thought when I reached the end of your touching story was, "Amelia had a convert." I was as attracted to the precious baby as your MC. Good storytelling!
This is so touching and I like how Graham's interest and obsessions change and his heart is softened. Great change, from "wanting" the "hot" Amelia to wanting to check in on the infant Amelia and her parents. I wish we were allowed more words for these challenges, as I would have liked to see more to this piece, it was so good.:0) Very well done! God bless!
This is an excellent contemporary setting for how the Kingdom of God can impact our lives in subtle and unexpected ways.
This is absolutely masterful. You certainly made your mc a real person, just like the rest of us. You did an incredible job walking that thin line. Excellent.
This is my favorite so far this week. I think it is such a creative way to write about the topic. Thank you.
What a fantastic turn-around. At first your MC was self-absorbed and despicable, yet by the end the reader couldn't help feeling sorry for him, even though he was still very much lost in his sins.
There was one line that read false to me right at the end - the bit about his father having maimed him. I don't know if this was physical or emotional, but depending on which it would probably affect how I would re-read the story. I'm not even sure that the line needs to be there. Aside from this minor quibble, it's wonderful writing with a great understanding of human nature.
Definitely a unique take on the topic. Good for you!

I stumbled on the word "Decimate".
It is the wrong word.

Decimate actually means "to destroy in large numbers/proportion" - so your usage is off here.

I think saying,"His family was killed" just simply and starkly...has more "pow" anyway.

That's my opinion.

Love your creativity here.:)

I really like the ending 2 lines, too.:) Good job.
Very strong story--What I like most about it is that it's a study in contrasts. The conflict is also beautifully drawn...great job! (Love the song titles theme, too...still think you could have used 'Louie, Louie').
Very good story, and very good writing. The contrast between the MC being drawn to hot Amelia and baby Amelia is brilliant. Excellent job with the topic.
Wonderful look at how God sometimes uses our tragedies to bring outsiders to Christ. Very well written. Great job!
Excellent work! I love how we set ourselves on a path, thinking it is going one direction and "bump" into God.
True vision of conflict in a tortured soul. You start out with such a different ego and then something happens along the way to start the heart melting.
Only God can use anything for good.
Love it.

Beautiful story and very touching to see how this family's tragedy was a witness to the MC. I hope this is happening in real life right now--somewhere in cyberspace!
Wow. With such a stark, raw beginning (right from the opening line), this entry wasn't at all what I expected. The MC's fascination/transformation had me breathless - suspenseful AND believable. Excellent.
Congratulations on your EC. Very good writing and story.
Congrats on the EC!
What an amazing story of a young man's journey to a selfless love of others! Congratulations!

Beautifully human rendition of grace at work in our human condition. Your gentle grace is so evident in your writer's touch.
Beautiful and captivating - this story of the transformation of a selfish life. You handled the transition delicately as it should have been with a child leading the way. Inspired!