The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1259 times
Member Comments
Nice story. "Despair fighting with hope, their blades hollowing his heart." -- Great image!
I loved the tranquility of this piece. I could feel it just as surely as you made me see the stars. "...a God who listens to our hearts sometimes telling us to simply move on." Soooooo good.
Unrequited love is the ultimate spilled milk. I really liked this character, (and his horse), and the gentle lesson that God is listening to our cries for help, even when we aren't sure if He is!
I love how you took the simple story of a man talking to his horse and combined it with great imagery and lots of wise pholosophy.
Nicely done. You caught the reflection of the MC realistically and drew me in. Watch your tenses--you skipped a few times, and it distracted me in the very first paragraph.
Excellent sense of place, and the dialog is also wonderful. I was completely captivated by this story from beginning to end.
Master story telling from beginning to end!
Excellent voice. You put me right in the middle of the scene. I enjoyed reading this.
Atmosphere is this story's strong point. I was with him under the stars. But what I wanted to tell this cowboy was "give her a second chance". True love doesn't die that easily. We need to keep on hoping when things seem hopeless. "Love bears all things" etc.
The images, the descriptions and especially the dialogue are all perfectly-executed. Great story!
Absolutely as mysteriously captivating as your title. I love the way you told an entire story in just a 'moment' of time. Just beautiful.
Wonderfully descriptive. You have captured the scene to perfection. I love your ending. Super job!
I like this! Your title-the word "Mystery" caught me and drew me in. The rambling sort of thought/dialouge kept me reading. My favorite character...was Taft! I liked him-and your closing paragraph. Great descriptions and a really, really good point. ^_^
Does Jackson yodel, too? He is a perfect cowboy... tough as nails, with a brain AND a heart. His horse is the winner just to be with him.

Great writing. I really enjoyed this entry.
I felt at peace through out this enchanting tale. Keep up the good words.
The writing is so descriptive the reader is placed in the scene. My favorite style of writing. Great MC and he talks to his horse! Love it. Super job.
Your nature descriptions are beautiful.. (I could picture it perfectly). I enjoyed the conversation between Jackson and Taft... :) Great writing and perfect for the topic.
It can be hard to keep a reader's attention while a character engages in thoughtful contemplation, but you managed it artfully. It fell like I was there studying the starlight as well.