The Official Writing Challenge
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Oh but how I love this one hon. Dramatic and meloncholy, with a bit of joy wrapped in the morsels of every day gifts that were given. Beautiful text, and I liked how you worked the little sparrow in yoru wonderful story. What a treasure. I could almost see the mother trodding along with her two daughters and the littel bird hoping along the handle of the carriage. Kind of enraptured me and took me back to my own childhood. God bless you for sharing this with us. Thank you.Janice+-
07/21/07
This is amazing (as usual, if this is who I think it is!) - the descriptions and characterization and dialogue and EVERYTHING are just wonderful. So poignant.
07/21/07
Wonderful story telling! I could see the action and the bird part was so real but when she sang the song - really good writing!
07/22/07
The most telling line, for me, was "I am free of the horrible things Papa says...", and I love the simple, homey details you add to this piece to make these characters so absolutely real. Heartbreaking, beautiful, full of hope. Thanks for sharing...
07/22/07
Very beautiful story. Touching and sweet the way Mama sees the good even in the middle of trouble. The ending is perfect. (The song is one of my favorites!)
07/22/07
This to me is an illustration of some of the wonders of the Christian faith: the ability to see beyond the temporal; the ability to have a heart free of bitterness in spite of being hurt...pure simple faith working through love. Very moving and well written.
This gave me goosebumps. Wow. Double Wow. Amazing. I liked the descriptions, but most of all the interaction between the mother and daughter. There was something so 'real' there. The touch of the Sparrow was great. ^_^
Love the dialogue and the sparrow is the perfect touch. Beautiful descriptions.
07/23/07
My favorite line was, "I'm free of the the hateful things Papa says." That's what God's peace does. Otherwise the sentence would be, "One day I will be free of the hatful things Papa says." No! She speaks of the joy Christ brings in the midst of difficult times. Great writing.
07/24/07
Yes. I am new to Faithwriters. Worked like yours is simply a great inspiration. Thank you.
Your story is so alive! I can picture the setting in my mind from the mother clawing for tubers to the sparrow strutting on the baby carriage. (By the way, I love the song "His Eye is on the Sparrow.")
God Bless,
Elizabeth
This si absolutely beautiful writing, the descriptions, the dialogue, the characters, the message. What a talent!
What a strong and grounded Mama. She has such peace and wisdom. Great story.
07/26/07
Ann, This is really beautiful. I was sorry to see that it did not place. Probably my favorite this week. Blessings, Teri
There is a book in here AWESOME as usual.