The Official Writing Challenge
BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN
INSTRUCTIONS
how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level
ENTRIES
submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners
Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.


TRUST JESUS TODAY

  • Share
  • how it works
  • Submit
Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: RECORD (04/22/21)
I tentatively stepped on the wood plank someone had placed over a muddy section on the trail. Rachel and I were power walking the same 5-miles we’d traversed for the last seven years. The path weaved around giant evergreens, ferns, soft moss, and over hills where lower regions became soggy and hard to tread during Washington’s rainy season. Each time we trudged through this beautiful haven that always smelled of fresh damp morning glory, I was able to escape the drama … if only for a little while.

“Have you tried to record the conversation?” Rachel asked. “It’s amazing what a recording can reveal.”

“No,” I said. “I don’t even know how to do that without him knowing.”

“You should try it,” she said. “Maybe it will help him realize how harsh he can be at times.”

Rachel had been my sounding board for the better part of two years, she was the one person I trusted with my marriage woes. I felt like I was walking on landmines most of the time, unable to do or say anything without making him angry.

I’d tried talking to the Pastor once. I don’t know what I expected, but things didn’t go at all as I had planned.

“Hannah, do you think your husband’s depressed?” he asked. The question caught me so off guard, I sat dumbfounded, uncertain how to respond.

“I don’t know,” I finally said.

“It sounds like he might be depressed,” he continued. “Many men go through this when they first retire. They feel like they’ve lost their purpose.”

I wasn’t happy with this assessment. I felt like he should have validated my feelings. I wanted him to acknowledge the fact that I’d been the one treated unfairly. Yet, he had made it all about my husband. I decided that, as a man, he obviously couldn’t understand how difficult things had been. I liked Rachel’s advice better.

I didn’t have to wait long, as we were arguing almost daily now. This altercation began like many others—over something trivial.

“You don’t wash the potatoes before you peel them?” he asked.

“No, they just get dirty again,” I said. “This way, I only have to wash them once.”

“Everyone washes potatoes before they peel them.”

“Well, I don’t,” I said, a little defensively this time.

I’m not really sure how things escalated from there, but before long, I was hearing about all the stupid things I’d ever done. He continued to attack, batting away my explanations like annoying insects. My defenses went up like Fort Knox. As I walked away, he continued hurling insults.

When I rounded the corner, I took out my phone and started recording. It was almost as if he knew, because shortly after I hit the red button, his words faltered. Normally these arguments went on and on, but suddenly it was over.

I tried to record future disagreements with the same results. After the third time, I began to wonder why. I’d been praying for months, asking God to reveal my part in our marriage problems. I knew I hadn’t been squeaky clean, though I was certain the bulk of the blame rested squarely on my husband’s shoulders.

After much prayer and introspection, I realized that each time I hit the record button, I’d stopped engaging. My husband always accused me of needing to have the last word. I had countered with the exact opposite assertion, but I couldn’t argue with the facts. The reason I hadn’t been able to gather ammunition against my husband was because I was part of the problem. My reactions to his insensitive comments had exacerbated the situation and escalated things to a whole other level.

Over time, I realized the Pastor had been right. Our disagreements hadn’t been about me at all. Not really. When I began to see things from my husband’s perspective, I stopped taking everything personally and our blowouts decreased.

Now, I regularly pray this scripture over myself: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.” (Philippians 2:3-4 NIV). It reminds me that while the world might encourage the all-about-me mindset, that isn’t what God desires from his children.
The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.
This article has been read 364 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Linda Lawrence 
04/29/21
VERY interesting--and thought provoking.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
04/30/21
This is an insightful piece. As my dad always said, it takes two to tango. I didn't understand what dancing had to do with my brother picking on me. ;) But looking back, I can see Dad's point. I'm sure many will see themselves in your story.
Sue Botte 
04/30/21
I take it this is non-fiction.

Twelve out of ten for your honesty. We all need to do introspection more often.

Thank your for sharing and keep writing.
Janice Aylor
05/05/21
Your story is great.

I like the way you describe the situation and eventually you come to realize you are part of the problem.

It is good to look at yourself sometimes.