Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: COLOR (07/30/20)
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TITLE: The Third Bike | Previous Challenge Entry
By John Custer
08/02/20 -
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Back then it was “cool” to put colored tape on the handlebars. (Does that date me?) To differentiate the three bikes, I got tapes of three different colors for the handlebars.
On Christmas Eve, after the girls went to bed, I brought the three bikes up into the living room. I was imagining what their reaction would be. All was set for Christmas morning.
When the oldest daughter saw her bike, she was ecstatic and so was our second daughter. The third daughter liked her bike but there was a problem: the tape on the handlebars was the wrong color. It was yellow. She was upset.
She was our adopted Asian daughter.
I did not intentionally identify the color of the tape with her race, but apparently she thought I did. Did I do it subconsciously? I felt bad that I had hurt her.
I loved her immensely. It was hard for me to put myself into her head…but I tried.
I got some different tape the next day and the crisis was averted. I wondered, however, why the color of the tape bothered her. Did she suspect that I thought differently of her because of giving her the yellow tape? Did I think of her subconsciously as Asian and that is why I selected the yellow tape for her bike? Those questions lingered for a long time after I put the new tape on the bike.
Down through the years I have worked hard to treat each of my daughters fairly, regardless of whether they are my biological children or my adopted children. It is, likewise, important that I treat all people as if their skin color was the same as mine.
Race should have no bearing on how we think of other people.
Prejudging someone based on skin color, religion, or ethnic group is called prejudice. A problem can also arise when someone prejudges me. It can and does go both ways.
How do we eliminate prejudice? I will only mention one way. Get to know the person. Spend time with him or her. After we get to know someone, we don’t think about our differences as much as what we have in common. Learn to appreciate how they are different.
As my daughter got older, she got to know my heart and she knew that I loved her and the color of her skin was irrelevant. After time I was assured that my attitude toward her was pleasing to God.
Today I could buy her anything yellow and she wouldn’t care. She knows me and she knows I would not intentionally offend her. She is a wonderful daughter and I have a lot of fun with her!
Race relations is not easy to solve, but we each must work hard to treat others as we would like to be treated.
(non-fiction)
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As to the question “Did I think of her subconsciously as Asian and that is why I selected the yellow tape for her bike?”
I’ll bet, since she is Asian, you consciously thought of her as Asian. There is nothing wrong with that. And I would also bet differentiating the tape based on nationality never crossed your mind.
I guess it helped you understand her sensitivity about it though. I am glad she seems better adjusted now.