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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: TRIP (10/18/18)
Our adult kids had moved out and since our California family nest was empty, my husband and I chose to migrate to a retirement nest in Oregon.

My husband had always enjoyed his children and missed them greatly. I, on the other hand, enjoyed having a quiet, orderly, clean nest — so much easier to maintain without our son and daughter’s debris — and did not miss the messes at all.

The memory of a particular incident traveled with me to Oregon and troubled me in my empty nest. It was a Sunday morning. My husband was out of town. I left the house early to attend Sunday School, the fellowship hour, and the worship service. Looking forward to a quiet Sabbath afternoon, I returned home to find the kitchen filled with dirty dishes — stacks of them. Then I remembered. Sean’s Surfers for Christ.

During high school, Sean dropped out of our church’s youth group, feeling like he didn’t belong. But he found a place that became a second home to him - a surf shop owned by a young man who had a passion for surfing and for Jesus. Surfers For Christ drew a hungry crowd.

Sean and his friends met for Bible study on Sunday mornings, taking turns meeting in each other’s homes. This week was Sean’s turn, but I never expected this!

Dismayed at the thoughtlessness of Sean and his friends, I wondered if it ever crossed their mind what an impression they were making on the parents in the homes where they had their breakfast Bible studies, leaving such a mess.

I started to wash the dishes, muttering all the while, but stopped, believing I needed to teach Sean that this was not acceptable. He needed to clean the kitchen. However, he wasn’t there and I was and every time I passed the kitchen I got mad all over again. Finally, I just washed the dishes.

That evening Sean brought home one of his friends and I flew into him with my pent-up irritation. But he took all the wind out from beneath my ruffled feathers when he said, “The girls wanted to do the dishes, but I told them not to because you would want to do them — as part of your ministry.”

Oooh! Ouch! I carried that guilt and shame all the way to Oregon. I didn’t unpack that baggage for several years but stumbled over its memory.

Finally, a day came when I wrote Sean a letter, asking his forgiveness for embarrassing him in front of his friend, and apologizing for being so spiritually immature while he was trying to be hospitable on that memorable day, years back.

I’ll never forget Sean’s phone call when he received the letter. Laughing, he said, “Mom, there’s nothing to forgive. I was just a smart alec teenager giving you a guilt trip!”

Well, the long ride was over — at last.

Memoir
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Trudy Newell
10/25/18
I loved this. A great take on the topic, and it brought lots of chuckles! Thanks for sharing. This is good!
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
11/02/18
This is a great story. You had me smiling and grimacing in all of the right places. I was a little confused because I thought Shawn was an adult until I reread the story. You did say in high school as an introduction, but I thought it was an introduction to the surf club. You could easily fix that with something like When we still lived in California and my son Sean was sixteen... I also wasn't sure who Sean was at first. Even when you mentioned local youth group, I pictured a kid from your church, so I was confused how Sean would know where you moved and how to get in. I think if you had added the kids' names back up in the empty nest section or say my son Sean's Surfers, that would have clarified it. I think a lot if my confusion came from opening paragraph. You were setting the scene in Oregon. If you moved that paragraph to the end just before mentioning carrying that shame,that might have cleared up my confusion.

However, I do think you have a great story. You have some great mental pictures. I can so relate to the empty nest part and even the shame of parenting goofs staying with me far longer than the kids lived with me. You have a strong message, a great conflict, and a wonderful resolution.