Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Omnishambles (05/01/14)
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TITLE: Diversion | Previous Challenge Entry
By Gary Ritter
05/02/14 -
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The revival had been gathering steam. No one could have predicted that on the Isle of Man, of all places, God would show up in such power. For the past three weeks at the little church in Union Mills people were coming from all the surrounding towns, first out of curiosity because of what they’d heard about miraculous healings, then because of conviction. People’s hearts were softening, men and women were proclaiming Christ as their Savior, the Spirit of the Lord was moving mightily.
From their place of observation above the village a gaggle of Light Bearers screamed and cursed at each other. There was plenty of blame to go around. They each had a human to influence, harass, and gain footholds in their lives, and things were not going well. The Enemy had pulled a fast one, coming in broad daylight to bring exaltation and worship to Himself. How disgusting, and terrifying! It wouldn’t be long before the Father Below came personally to inspect the debacle. When he did the Light Bearers all knew there would be some in their coterie that would no longer be. Fear as a motivator was the Father Below’s primary motivator for his minions, and it worked well.
“If we don’t do something, this revival will be a major omnishambles for us,” one Light Bearer said. “We need a diversion.”
“Something new and different,” said another.
“A talking animal,” said a third.
They settled on a mongoose, which the third Light Bearer possessed because he thought up the idea.
Later that day a poor farmer by the name of Irving saw a mongoose, rare in the British Isles, and known only by Mr. Irving because his daughter had recently brought home a picture of one from school. The farmer thought he might take the animal for a pet and keep it to eat mice, but that thought quickly fled.
The mongoose began to sing a popular song of the day, Carolina Moon: “Now the years have blown by me like the wind through the pines…”
That stopped the farmer in his tracks. He said, “How do you know that song?”
The mongoose shrugged. “One of my favorites. You’re fortunate I’m in a good mood. My name is Gef. You can feed me now. How about sausage and kippers?”
After introducing Gef to his family and learning from the mongoose some gossip about the neighbors, Irving took the animal to church that evening.
As expected the talking mongoose made quite a hit. He charmed the children, dished out political scandal, and otherwise diverted the service.
The next day Gef was the talk of Union Mills and every village within shouting distance. Children clamored at their parents to visit the Irvings. They put Gef on display and the talking animal didn’t disappoint. Who ever heard of such a thing? It was a miracle and everyone wanted a piece of it.
The revival died as Gef occupied the thoughts of the majority of families in the area. He often spouted metaphysical ideas, proclaiming them as would an Old Testament prophet. The Irvings began charging admission to see and hear Gef and did quite well. Journalists came and news of the “man-weasel” spread throughout Britain.
One day Gef simply disappeared. It disappointed the Irvings to no end, but they’d had a good run and couldn’t complain.
At their gathering place high over the village the Light Bearers congratulated themselves. They had averted a major catastrophe, not least by adroitly keeping the Father Below from stepping in and decimating their ranks. There was even talk among themselves of promotion within the spiritual hierarchy because of the way the Enemy’s people had been neutralized. There was nothing like a good distraction to keep humans from keeping their foolish eyes from the One who had, unfortunately, created, sustained, and died for them.
“Perhaps next time,” one Light Bearer mused, “we’ll let the humans see lighted carriages in the sky. If they think beings from other planets have come to visit, surely we’ll turn them from any desire to worship the Enemy.”
“Even better,” another Light Bearer said, “we’ll make them believe the alien beings created them!”
A chorus of excited shouts erupted as a dark cloud enveloped the Light Bearers.
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