The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
07/28/18
I haven't been much in the news lately: What happened in Branson?

I thought you started strong but I was too preoccupied with wanting to know about what happened to really focus in on your spiritual application.
A fitting title and admonition to be ready for Jesus' return. Elimination of unnecessary words will improve your writing. For example, Instead of "Here in Missouri" -- in Missouri; "This last week" -- last week. Don't use two words when one will convey the same thought. You have a great message -- make it shine.



07/31/18
This needs a short explanation at the beginning of what happened in Branson. Good lesson from a current event, but we need to know what is the current event.