The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/21/22
It's good, but difficult, to step into the hearts and minds of Bible story characters as they meet up with Jesus. You've captured some good details here, and I'd encourage you to keep drawing out more of the background to feed your readers' imagination and involvement in your stories.
01/23/22
A good retelling of Jesus healing a blind man. Thank you. Keep writing.
I really enjoyed this story from an original POV. I liked the Bible verse you used to se the scene. It might have been even stronger if you left out the first two paragraphs and started right with Bartimus' story. You did a nice job of writing on topic too. The ending wrapped it up nicely and delivered the message without pounding it into the reader's head. Congratulations on ranking 7th in your level. The highest rankings can be found on the message boards.