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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: STRETCH (04/08/21)
Gentlemen”s Agreement


Times were bad for everyone in one way or another. The pandemic had touched lives all over the world. No country had escaped its fury. The end of this virus was no where in sight.

Bryan had about enough money in his bank account to carry him through the next month. He had to close his restaurant early in the beginning of pandemic because of the mandatory stay at home law.


It had been a year now since this virus first started. Things have only just begun to open up a little. Some restaurants were opening up with to go orders and outside dinning. Bryan had been able to partially open as well and take out orders were picking up, but still it wasn’t quite enough to make things run smoothly. What Bryan had been praying about was how to get the money he needed for outdoor seating, this would increase his business.

He had a good number of his old customers taking advantage of his carry out service, but it was also apparent some would love to actually eat at the restaurant and have a nice dinner out.



It was a busy Saturday evening when Jim stopped by and ask to speak to Bryan. Jim was a well know figure around town, Bryan was not personal friends with him but he knew who Jim was. Bryan stepped outside to see Jim,
“Hello, I was told you wanted to speak with me” said Bryan. “Yes, I have some ideas I would like to talk over with you. I know you are busy tonight, but would it be possible to meet with me at my office on Monday morning, around 9:30” ask Jim.
Bryan agreed to the meeting, very curious as to what it could be about. Bryan could not image what Jim wanted, but odd as it may be he had a good feeling about it.

“Good morning Bryan, come on in and have a seat. “ I know you must be wondering why I have asked you to meet with me” Jim said. Bryan smiled saying “ I have to admit I am more then a little bit curious”.


“Well I have an idea I want you to consider. I know times have been very difficult and I know you can’t fully open your restaurant. I have looked around your place and see that you have lots of space for outside dinning. How would you feel about letting me help you with an outside dinning area?” Jim asked. “I don’t know quite what to say Jim, what did you have in mind? But before we go any further I need to let you know right up front I am in no financial position to do very much” replied Bryan.

“Jim explained “ it won’t cost you a penny right now, I have seen how hard you have worked to stay above water and I want to extend an interest free loan to you and send a few men over to help you at no charge”.

“Bryan you look confused, let me explain. I was on my daily walk the other day and when I passed your place I felt God was telling me to help you get back on your feet and then He showed me how he wanted me to help you, by offering an interest free loan and free labor to get the work done. The only thing you need to do is say yes and we can get things rolling as early as tomorrow.”

Bryan ask Jim how long he would have to repay the loan. He also told him he thought it would probably take about $10,000.00 to get the outside dinning ready. Jim explained to Bryan he would not have to pay anything until he was in the black and then he could pay $500.00 a month until the $10,000.00 loan is paid back.

Bryan told Jim to draw up the agreement papers and let him know when they were ready for him to sign. Jim got up from his chair ,walked over to Bryan and said “I want this to be a gentlemen’s agreement no paper work involved” Jim stretched out his hand and Bryan shook it to seal the deal.

That was 4 years ago, Bryan’s business is better now then it ever was. The loan has been paid in full and Bryan and Jim have become best friends. The whole experience turned out to be a blessing to both men.
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Noel Mitaxa 
04/16/21
An interesting story, but it would flow more smoothly with pronouns to avoid too frequent use of Bryan's name.
You have also mixed past and present tense in some paragraphs, which can also be a little confusing.
Your intro is arresting and topical, as the pandemic is on everyone's mind, but you have set your ending for three years before the pandemic arrived, which unfortunately adds to the confusion.
Noel Mitaxa 
04/16/21
An interesting story, but it would flow more smoothly with pronouns to avoid too frequent use of Bryan's name.
You have also mixed past and present tense in some paragraphs, which can also be a little confusing.
Your intro is arresting and topical, as the pandemic is on everyone's mind, but you have set your ending for three years before the pandemic arrived, which unfortunately adds to the confusion.
Noel Mitaxa 
04/16/21
An interesting story, but it would flow more smoothly with pronouns to avoid too frequent use of Bryan's name.
You have also mixed past and present tense in some paragraphs, which can also be a little confusing.
Your intro is arresting and topical, as the pandemic is on everyone's mind, but you have set your ending for three years before the pandemic arrived, which unfortunately adds to the confusion.
Noel Mitaxa 
04/16/21
I'm sorry to appear heavy-handed, but my laptop did not register my first two attempts to send.
Sue Botte 
04/18/21
A heartfelt story of God's grace and a man obedient to God's voice. I read past the few mistakes; thank you for sharing.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
04/22/21
You have a great idea for a story here that everyone can relate to. I don't think you need all the backstory though. Slip the pertinent parts in among the story and work on showing with dialog, body language, and thoughts. You did a good job of writing on topic. You also have a great message. Keep writing. You have some wonderful ideas and I look forward to reading more of your work.