Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Gossip/Rumors (either or both) (10/28/10)
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TITLE: Creepy crawler | Previous Challenge Entry
By monica lopez
11/03/10 -
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ADD TO MY FAVORITES
I try hard to avoid it but at times
I find myself tangled up in
its sticky web.
It is the creepy crawler gossip,
I try hard to evade.
We were close back in the days,
when I worked at the office
and in between coffees
my girlfriends and I used to
exchange comments
about everyone else.
It is ok as long as we mean well,
we used to say.
Of course, back then
we weren’t familiar with the Word;
we lacked the wisdom to know best.
“gossip break up friendships”
The Lord warns us;
and I learned the hard way.
“Listening to gossip is like eating
cheap candy;
do you really want junk like that
in your belly?
Proverbs 18:8
This verse I now treasure and I
try my best to stay vigilant and alert;
and when I see it coming my way
I run, hide or shut the door in its face.
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Just a little red ink OK is spelled okay or both letters should be capitalized. Either way is acceptable.
You did a great job of pulling me into your poem. I could really feel your emotions and feel that you've tried really hard to stop gossiping. Your comparison of gossip to a sticky web is brilliant. Keep up the good work.
Be careful of using too many metaphors--in this, you have gossip as a spider and as candy, and also something that you 'shut the door' on. Sometimes a poem is more effective when just one metaphor is used throughout.
Nevertheless, this has some really fine imagery, and I enjoyed reading it.