Christian Living

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I have had my fill recently of people saying either they have no friends, or that “no-one ever calls me”.

Sometimes that is really true, but I am discovering that all too often it means that “they (the other person) never puts out the energy to call me, and life is really all about me.”

I hate to tell you, pal, but friendships take effort. They are give and take. Sometimes there are seasons in a friendship that one person is really needy. Other times, you are the one that needs TLC. But there must be a balance. God allows us friendships to expose the rough edges in our personalities – the areas we need to change, the areas we can use softening or refining – and He uses friendships to file down those rough edges. Will you ever have disagreements? You bet! But learn from those disagreements. Learn how to communicate, learn how to forgive. None of us were given the gift of life so that we could live like the Lone Ranger.

But you may be asking "How can I make new friends?" A valid question. Cultivate new hobbies, develop your interests and talents. Take classes. Volunteer in your community. Donate time and effort to worthy causes. You will meet people with common interests and values in these kinds of places.

If you are ready to really grow in this area, why not evaluate what it is you are going to do to make new friends and what can you do to sustain the old ones that are "keepers"? How can you cultivate a deeper friendship with the people that are willing to weather the storms of life with you?

After all, if you just want to keep people at arms length, don’t bother calling them friends. They are merely acquaintances. Listen to your self talk and you may discover that you are the reason you feel friendless. Learn to give (not like a dormat) of yourself, and learn to receive from others. Dare to make the changes necessary to become a true friend. Why? Because true friends go the distance with each other, and that, quite honestly, is priceless.

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