Book Navigation
  • Hire
    Writers
    Editors
  • Home
  • Read
    What's
    New
  • Join
    Faith
    Writers
  • Forum
  • My
    Account
    Login
  • Shop
    Save
    Support
  • Book
    Store
  • Learn
    About
    Jesus
Return to Content
  • Read Our Devotional
  • Opportunities to be Published
The Home for Christian Writers! Matthew 6:33

Prophecy

PLEASE ENCOURAGE AUTHOR BY COMMENTING
  Leave Comment   Message Writer
  Hire Writer
Report Article
  Track Writer
  Add to Favorites
Jonah wears a Shamu T Shirt

by Julie Michaelson
03/20/08
For Sale
Author requests article critique

  Message Writer Mail
  Hire Writer

Tweet

What no eye has seen,
nor ear heard,
nor the heart of man
conceived,
what God has prepared
for those who love Him.
[1 Corinthians 2:9]
**************************
"I don't believe in Heaven,
Lord."

[PATIENT SILENCE.]

"Well, at least the way people
talk about it; it sounds way
too PERFECT, You know?"

"Tell Me, child."

"Well......knowing what Earth is
like......"

"It's not Earth, child."

"Yeah; but, YOU made
it, DIDN'T You?"

[NOD.]
"Yes, My precious.
I did."

"That's what I mean, Lord.
I'm sorry, but I over
half century now, and I
must say I'm pretty
disappointed in the
whole thing."

"What, child?"

"Earth."

[NOD.]
"Well, that's really not
true, Lord; the Grand Canyon,
and Niagra Falls were pretty
neat, but......that's about it."

[CHUCKLE.]
"And, My seas,
child?"

"Hm......I like the New Jersey
coast. I've been to Hawaii,
the Riviera, and Spain;
but.....the Eastern U.S. shoreline
is just more....REAL.
There's like, this BRINY
smell there;
Ya know what I MEAN?"

"Yes, My beloved."

"Anyhow, getting back to
Heaven: I don't expect
that much, Lord."

[NOD.]
"I see, My precious."

"Well, I'm sorry, LORD!
But, Ya know: what with
SATURN losing its RINGS!
And, PLUTO just turning
out to be a DWARF planet!
(Sigh.)
It's just all very disappointing,
You KNOW?"

"Yes, My beloved."

"The other problem I have,
is: what about all the people
from all these different CENTURIES?"

[SMILE!]
"How so, child?"

"Well.......take all those
guys from the Old Testament;
how are they gonna get
along with us from the
21st CENTURY? It just
doesn't make any SENSE!"

[LAUGH!]

"WELL? What d'Ya DO
about THAT?"

"It is a Mystery,
My precious one."

(Squint.)
(Frown.)
"I don't get it;
I just can't picture
Jonah wearing torn jeans,
a Shamu the Whale T-shirt,
and carrying an a cup of
Starbucks' Decaf.
(Deep squint.)
The problem is,
once he gets a look at
us guys from - Ya know -
the 1970's, 80's,
90's, and whatever;
he's not gonna want to
keep wearing those long,
dirty ROBES, IS he?"

[BURST OUT LAUGHING!]

"I'm SERIOUS, Lord!
But, I don't think You've
thought this whole thing out.
Like......if we've from ONE
century, do we live, like,
on a different LEVEL?"

"Which level is that,
child?"

"I DUNNO!
I thought You had, like,
THOUGHT all this stuff,
OUT!"

"This is all a Mystery,
My child."

"Is that why You're takin'
so long, in coming BACK,
Lord? You're still
tryin' to figure all this,
OUT? It's a pretty big
venture: I gotta admit.
Walt DISNEY didn't
have this big of a Theme Park!"

[WIPES HIS EYES FROM
TEARS of LAUGHTER.]
"Oh, My little one!"

"And, what about MOSES?
Ya know what's gonna happen,
Lord: everybody from the
20th century is gonna show up,
and say:

'HEY, dude!
You sure don't
look like the real
Charlton HESTON!
How come you're not
tall, and handsome?
What HAPPENED?'

Poor GUY! I sort'a feel
SORRY for him. First,
he had to put up with all
those kvetching Israelites
in that hot desert -
and he didn't even get to
the Promised Land,
'cuz of that Water-in-
the-Rock-Incident, and
then 2,000 years later
some weird-lookin' guys
show up and make FACES
at him!
(Thoughtful squint.)
Maybe, You should move
him over to the other side,
Lord."

[CHUCKLE!]
"The other side of WHAT,
child?"

"I DUNNO;
maybe, to the OTHER
side of the Promised Land!"

"But, there is no other
side, child."

"NO?"

"Hm, hm.
There's just My Side."
****************************
And the Lord
appointed a great fish
to swallow up Jonah.
[Jonah 1:17]









PLEASE ENCOURAGE AUTHOR BELOW LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
Reader Count & Comments
Date

The opinions expressed by authors do not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com. This is especially true with articles that deal with personal healthcare and prophecy. We encourage the reader to make their own decision in consultation with God, His Word, and others as needed.

This article has been read 1070 times    < Previous | Next >
Read more articles by Julie Michaelson or search for other articles by topic below.
Search for articles on: (e.g. creation; holiness etc.)
Read more by clicking on a link:
Free Reprints
Main Site Articles
Most Read Articles
Highly Acclaimed Challenge Articles.
New Release Christian Books for Free for a Simple Review.

God is Not Against You - He Came on an All Out Rescue Mission to Save You


...in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them... 2 Cor 5:19

Therefore, my friends, I want you to know that through Jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you. Acts 13:38

LEARN & TRUST JESUS HERE

FaithWriters offers Christian reading material for Christian readers. We offer Christian articles, Christian fiction, Christian non-fiction, Christian Bible studies, Christian poems, Christian articles for sale, free use Christian articles, Christian living articles, New Covenant Christian Bible Studies, Christian magazine articles and new Christian articles. We write for Jesus about God, the Bible, salvation, prayer and the word of God.




Home  |   My Account  |   What's New  |   Site Map  |   Contact Us  |   Help  |   Blog
Monthly Newsletter  |   SITE INFO  |   Link To Us  |   Become A Member  |   Sponsors  |   ADVERTISING