Poetry

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Seventy Time Seven

Seventy times seven every day
How many times is what the Lord had to say
Forgiveness for wrongs done to me
Even more for the face in the mirror I see

Lord, Your patients knows no bounds
Each day my sins knock me to the ground
But seventy times seven the times you forgive
For this very reason You died so I may live

My righteousness is filthy rags before You
But Your blood covers what I do
My capacity for sin still exists
So seventy times seven I need for those I don’t resist

Seventy times seven and so much more
My past sins and tomorrow’s You bore
The sacrifice made once and for all
Seventy times seven for Your forgiveness I call


Brothers and Sisters,

This has been a while in the making…the poem and the life. This came to me during the holidays, but I couldn’t bring it together until I understood a few thing a little better. Many of you know of my journey into the wilderness. Going by the high standards I had set for myself it was not a very successful journey. But it is not for me that I live and therefore I believe viewed through God it was a tremendous success.

I have learned humility. This journey I set out on I thought was for me to learn to spread the gospel, but what I learned was that this was a journey into me. I slipped and stumbled through many situations. I lost some good habits and found some old bad habits. Basically, this journey put me face to face with the old me.

I am trying to find ways to put all of this into perspective and even share it through some writing, some of it I have already managed to write and post, but there is so much more coming together.

I was getting beat down with guilt and shame. I was allowing this to interrupt my prayer life and my relationship with the Lord. I have missed you. Yes, even coming here has been hindered by guilt and shame. Don’t worry the Lord has given me a wake-up call and I can see again.


Being beat down I did a very fleshly thing, I have been trying to earn my grace back. It has taken a long time to remember that I never earned it in the first place and my efforts were in fact defeating the gift that is grace.

It is easy to think that your past sins are forgiven because of Christ’s sacrifice. I remember getting saved and thinking how glad I was that the terrible deeds that I had done in the past were now forgiven and forgotten. What I have been struggling with is the concept that all my sins are forgiven in that wonderful sacrifice. The ones I committed since the day of my salvation to the ones I will commit until I am called home. Yes, repentance is still required, but the forgiveness…that grace is still there. Seventy time seven and so much more we are forgiven. God is good!!!

In Christ always,
Christian

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