Humor

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Why am I in peril every hour?
[1 Corinthians 15:30]
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"Morning' Lord!"

"Good morning, child."

"I'm half asleep, right now, Lord,
but I've been wanting to ask You
a question."

"No, you can't get a tattoo."

"Oh, I've already forgotten about that,
Lord. Although, now that You mention it,
my birthday IS coming up."

"Spend your day reading My Word."

"Yes, Lord. I plan to do that, but....."

"But, what."

"Aw, come on, Lord! I'm half-asleep! I
can't even think right now."

"Good. Read My Word."

"I'm going to, Lord! I promise!
But, first I wanted to ask You...."

"What: this isn't about your job, again,
is it. Child, you need to have patience."

"Yes, I know, Lord: patience and long-suffering;
although I've never been fond of either of those
qualities, to be very honest."

"I know, child. That is why I am teaching you
them."

"Oy, vey."

"Well said, child. Now, what was it you wanted
to ask?"

"Oh, it was about 24, Lord!"

"24. 24 what?"

"You know, Lord: that show, '24 Hours'. Do You
like it?"

"Precious, I thought perhaps, you had awoken early
to pray, and meditate on My Word?"

"Well, I HAVE, Lord! See: I put that Scripture up
there - about being in peril every day!"

"Child, My Word is not referring to a television show."

"Well, yeah. That's true, Lord, but You know that
our society, today, is forever glued to television.
I don't think there's anything wrong with relating it to
Scripture."

"Vey es mir."

"You bet, Lord! Well? What do You think of
the show, '24'? Huh?"

[LONG SUFFERING SILENCE.]

"Yeah, I know, Lord. It's pretty silly. I mean,
I can't understand how those guys spend all
day at work, and never have a cup of coffee,
munch on a Snickers bar, or take a break for
5 minutes, and read a cartoon in the Washington Post."

[SILENCE.]

"Oh, Lord! You have to admit that You've watched it."

"I see everything, child."

"Yeah, I still think that guy's father was better
in 'Eye of the Needle'. Don't You think so?"

"Who, child?"

"Lord, You really should watch our movies, more.
I'm talking about Donald Sutherland; You know,
Keifer's dad."

"Ah, yes."

"I actually think he was a lot, eh....cuter."

"Cuter, child?"

"Well, Lord! I'm putting this on FaithWriters, Lord;
I can't use just ANY words."

"Ah, but You can say anything to Me, child."

"Later, Lord. Anyhow, what should I do about
my job situation? It's all a flahbungah, Lord!"

"Good word, child."
[SILENCE.]
"Wait on ME, child.
Wait on your Lord.
And, be patient."

"Okay, Lord. Okay. I'll try.
I promise. Maybe, next time we
can talk about 'American Idol'.
Hey, those are two words we
don't find in Scripture, Lord."

"NO?"

"Oy, You're right, Lord.
Wow: I guess I need to flip
through my Bible, again, huh."

[NOD.]
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You shall not make idols for yourselves......
For I am the Lord your God.
[Leviticus 26:1]

If anyone says to you,
'This was offered to idols',
do not eat it......
for the earth is the Lord's.....
[1 Corinthians 10:30]

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(For Irene&Samantha.)

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